ABOUT LAKE AMERICA What's the name of the river that separates Texas from Mexico? The Rio Grande? That's right. The Rio Grande. If you're standing on the north bank. But if you wade across and stand on the south bank, what's its name then? If you say, "The Rio Grande," you're an American. But if you say, "The Rio Bravo," you're a Mexican. Because that one river has two names. One officially recognized by the American government and one officially recognized by the Mexican government. Kind of like the Persian Gulf. On its eastern shores it is the Persian Gulf, on its western shores it is the Arabian Gulf. One body of water, two names, reflecting the values, heritage and pride of the nations which surround it. A last example: The South China Sea. One body of water, officially known as the South China Sea to China, the East Sea to Vietnam and the West Sea to the Philippines. Which means if Canada wants to call the easternmost body of fresh water between itself and the United States Lake Ontario, and the United States wants to call that same body of fresh water Lake America, it would be in keeping with a practice established around the world for centuries. Kind of like the practice of governments changing the names of geographical features for political reasons, like Presidents Obama and Biden did some 650 times. You knew that, right? In the last two Democrat administrations, the federal government went on a spree, scrubbing the map of names, people, words and races it found politically unacceptable. Remember Mount McKinley, Point Barrow, Squaw Peak and Fort Polk? So, the precedent is broadly and repeatedly established by Barack Obama and Joe Biden -- a president can name any damn thing any damn thing for any damn reason. Like Trump did. Like Trump trolled Democrats into believing he did. It's like he's got a laser pointer and they're a roomful of cats. He plays them like a fish. He posts on Truth Social and they shit their pants. He scribbles with his giant Sharpie and their heads explode. He says something about Lake Ontario and they completely forget the six-month anniversary of the Iran War. The Democrats and their puppets on the evening news. Moron politicians with social media posts from the shore, breathless reporters doing Man On The Street with men on the beach, indignant Canadians spitting on America, earnest Native Americans explaining etymology. He leads them around by the nose. "Republicans take Trump seriously, but not literally," a smart man said. "Democrats take Trump literally, not not seriously." And so he trolls them, for fun and sport. And distraction. Because the same Democrats and reporters who seem to believe Trump gives a damn what Lake Ontario is called are completely oblivious to the real issue at hand -- which is how the Canadians have lived like leeches off American prosperity for generations. Take 2025, for example. Last year, Canada's trade surplus with the United States was about $150 billion. That means that as a result of trade between the two nations, they ended up $150 billion richer and we ended up $150 billion poorer. That happens because they rip us off. They rig the game to enrich themselves and impoverish us. That grabbing of American cash becomes more galling when you look at the rest of Canada's top-10 trading relationships, in which it runs a trade deficit with every nation except the United Kingdom and the Netherlands. In fact, if it wasn't ripping the United States off for $150 billion a year, Canada would run a net trade deficit with the world, meaning that each year it would export wealth and become poorer and poorer. But it takes our money to paper over its weakness. If it wasn't siphoning off America's prosperity through unfair trade practices, Canada would fall on its financial face. We carry it on our backs, at the expense of American jobs and prosperity. And that's what has Trump pissed off. That is what he cares about. No matter what you call the lake.