played junior monopoly with my 5 y/o this morning - he cried when he had to pay me rent and honestly same hun
3 year old woke up crying hysterically for the second time this evening. When I asked if I could get him anything to help he threw his head back and bellowed without a hint of context “I JUST WANT SOME SNOW” at the ceiling so that should be an easy fix
this evening my son told me he couldn’t get to sleep because my breathing was “too loud and too much” and asked if I could “please stop” how’s your week going?
If I just tagged you in a tweet trying to flog sunglasses (maybe although who knows what'd happen when you clicked on those links), sorry lads! Thanks to everyone who alerted me to the fact that I need to up my password game 😘
Just discovered there's an episode of Paw Patrol called "Pups Get Skunked" and tea came out of my nose
Thanks iPhone that’s about as useful as a 12-hour delivery slot window - let the games of underwear roulette begin 🎉
emily layton retweeted
I'm looking to speak to a medical expert on how antidepressants can affect contraception - deadline flexible. Retweets and tips appreciated! Please message if that's you or someone you know #journorequest
Leo's new favourite "game" is shouting I HAVE A COUGH randomly as we walk down the street (he doesn't) and it really is a fucking nightmare
Today my son said that his lunch tasted “lucky” and these are the only kinds of magical descriptions I’m interested in hearing from now on thanks
emily layton retweeted
Do you need to hire an Intimacy Director? With Intimacy Pōneke, I created this basic guideline for directors, producers & theatres. Actors, you can use this too to know when to ask for an ID! There are other factors but hopefully this will be helpful and begin new conversations.
emily layton retweeted
The thing i love most about Bill Withers singing is how much he looked like a shy uncle who's been asked to give a speech at his niece's 21st
I’m not sure what is more soul-crushing: lockdown 3.0 or trying to explain to a 2-year-old that Christmas is over











