@dwschwab

Illustration + Creative + Karaoke + Comedy + Memes

 Awestome, TX
solo.to/dwschwab
Joined June 2009
  • Tweets13.6K
  • Following619
  • Followers704
1.6KMedia
Dave Schwab retweeted
Liam Nissan™
@theliamnissan23h
It's funny how Greg Abbott and Ken Paxton are running on "Fixing Texas" when the Republicans have controlled the entire state for 30 goddamn years
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Dave Schwab retweeted
Rob Bloom@robbloomcwOct 12
Early Universal Studios Florida attractions were all about riding the movies...and terrifying guests. Here's :40 of guests losing their minds on Earthquake.
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He says the name just fine when he’s begging the Qataris for a personal jet or the Saudis for funding for his son-in-law’s private equity firm. Wonder what’s changed?
Aaron Rupar
@atruparOct 16
Trump on El-Sayed: "His name is actually Abduladadalalalala. It's Adulbabababababa Mohammed Al-Sayed. So his middle name is Mohammed. So I was right. He's a jihadist."
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Fox commentator: Paxton doesn't have any values. I don't know how he'll vote. I suspect he'll vote for whoever the highest bidder is, which is certainly what we've seen him do in the Attorney General’s Office. He’s been the worst possible Attorney General on open records requests that we've ever had. I don't think you have any idea what he's going to do in the Senate.
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The Republican-controlled board of elections shut down the 1 early voting site at North Carolina A&T University—a historically Black college—so students marched an hour to vote. CONGRATULATIONS TO THESE STUDENTS FOR FIGHTING BACK. WE MUST ALL DO THE SAME.
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He’s so good at this!
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Scandals this week in the Texas senate race: Ken Paxton on video with his latest mistress partying in Dubai with a wanted fugitive who committed over $300 million in health care fraud and gave $190K to Paxton. James Talarico stayed home to recover from the flu.
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Dave Schwab retweeted
K A C E Y
@KaceyMusgravesOct 12
I don’t think you have a dog in this fight but if you did you would have shot it.
Kristi Noem
@KristiNoemOct 12
I’ll take @ellalangleymsic over Kacey Musgraves any day. And if I’m choosin’ Texas, I’ll take Ken Paxton over James Talarico.
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This shit is INSANE.
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Q: President Trump said that you and Ken Paxton should debate... What are your thoughts on that? @JamesTalarico: I agree with President Trump. I think Ken Paxton should debate. The president is saying he should debate. Fox News has said he should debate. The people of Texas have said he should debate. And I think it's mysterious that Ken Paxton hasn't responded to a request for a debate in 85 days. I hear that people are getting really concerned about the Attorney General. I’ve heard rumors that he has a rare medical condition that causes clinical levels of cowardice. I know Ken Paxton has asked for proof of life from me. I'm asking for proof of spine from him.
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a decade later and still rings true
Alex Hirsch
@_AlexHirsch9 Nov 2016
The inability of the left to distinguish between an imperfect ally and an enemy is the height of privilege and will be our downfall
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i don’t have a girlfriend but if I did i would not let her hang out with Chester cheetah
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Dave Schwab retweeted
Pope Leo XIV
@PontifexOct 10
The death penalty is inadmissible because it is an attack on the inviolability and dignity of the person. The common good can be safeguarded and the requirements of justice can be met without recourse to capital punishment: effective systems of detention have been developed that protect citizens while at the same time do not completely deprive those who are guilty of the possibility of redemption. #NoDeathPenalty
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Dave Schwab retweeted
Captain YUMA@yumaboomaOct 8
Every new picture I see from the oval office just looks like this
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fox news is literally just cocomelon for boomers
Christian Nightmares@ChristnNitemareOct 4
"Talk about testosterone!" Apparently, this guy met Manly MAGA Jesus in Heaven...
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Dave Schwab retweeted
Anonymous
@YourAnonNewsOct 5
Exactly.
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Dave Schwab retweeted
Tommy Santos
@tommysantos14Oct 5
There have been five recessions since 1981. Republicans: 5 Democrats: 0 Stop voting Republican.
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ashing my nature valley bar out the window like a cigarette
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That’s the backstrap. Most tender cut of the pizza. It belongs to the hunter.
Complex
@ComplexOct 2
Pizza employee gets caught finessing slice from someone’s order [H/T: IG guysrunningfromcop]
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The older I get the stayer I home.
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