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“Pick another protein? Shiiiiiiiiit I’d rather pick another senator instead” is my newest vocal stim
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When someone shoots down your idea, remember that God put that idea in your imagination, not theirs.
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Convincing people with six teeth to defend people with eight yachts may be the greatest political con job in modern history.
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Marcus Aurelius wrote this over 1800 years ago:
“Do not disturb yourself by imagining your whole life at once.”
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A man without a dream or vision will perish. You got to always have something you're shooting for.
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I saw a post on Reddit that said, “When you walk through a museum, you’re not just looking at art. You’re moving through centuries of people trying to explain love, grief, power, beauty, and belonging.” I don’t think I’ve ever seen a museum described so beautifully.
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Neverrrrrrrrrrrr Everrrrrrrrrrrr underestimate how much of a blessing it is to have zero health problems and your mum still alive.
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A friendly reminder that Carl Jung believed life doesn’t truly begin until your 40s. Everything before that is just research and development.
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Do you realize how unlikeable of a country you have to be for LATINOS to root for SPAIN (the country that colonized them) over you??????
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I can't breathe the air, I can't eat lettuce, I can't afford gas, and my kids have measles. But at least now our soldiers will have enough testosterone.
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While you were figuring out how to pay rent, your president made $2.2 billion.
While your groceries got more expensive, he was collecting $636M off a memecoin his own supporters lost money on.
Who exactly is he working for? Not us.
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Things most Americans agree on:
Groceries cost too much.
Tariffs suck and make no sense.
Congress and Presidents shouldn’t trade stocks.
The debt is a mess.
The border should be secure, but legal immigration is good.
Endless wars are stupid, especially ones that nobody wants and have never been explained.
Americans are exhausted.
AI is like my new best friend that also might be trying to take my job, my ability to think for myself, and my humanity in the process. Yo like I love you, but WTF, but I still love you.
Diversity is actually awesome! The opposite is boring AF.
Canadians are super fucking cool.
Mexicans are chill.
Putin isn’t a good guy looking out for America’s best interest. Rocky IV and Miracle are great movies.
Good neighbors are a blessing.
Freedom of religion and coexistence without having to blow each other up is probably a good idea.
We all question, are we alone in the universe?
We all fuck up along the way.
Epstein didn’t hang himself.
The Trumps and Epstein were best friends for decades. It’s like Bert trying to tell us Ernie was just an acquaintance in the same social scene on Sesame Street back in the day.
The Cowboys suck. Go Birds!
Things we’re told to fight about:
Me.
Laptop.
Vaccines.
Transgenders in sports.
Pronouns.
That’s the joke.























