Chris P.

Look, I still think Truckin’ is one of Jerry Garcia’s finest songs - hang on, goddamnit, that’s just Teen Wolf’s dad.

This is Sisu. He’s a stray who kept repeatedly entering a Dollar Store in North Carolina and trying to steal this purple unicorn. When animal control officers arrived, they bought it for him and now he, and the unicorn, have been adopted. There’s your good news for tonight.

Thank god my teachers adequately prepared me for the computer age by learning to write like some 18th century aristocrat.

Voted by the seniors “Most Likely to Fuck Up His Dad’s Car.”

I’m still kinda pissed Letterman didn’t get The Tonight Show.

“What the fuck is a grit?” 👉 super70ssportsstore.com

He looks like the last popsicle in the freezer.

And a magical genie appeared and granted David Gilmour 3 wishes ... “I’d like a joint.” “Your wish is my command.” “Wow. Ok, I wish Paul McCartney was here with me.” “It is done, master. You have one wish remaining.” “I wish McCartney looked more like a struggling magician.”