Yo @TheoVon I have a date on Friday and she is on the fence about @BusboysMovie after seeing the trailer. What do I? Thanks in advance. Praise God.

This is insane!

Turn the noise down on the internet por favor.

I just got told there’s a problem when no one is laughing at a comedian. I guess I’m no one again. What is this, 2006 baseball try outs? #shanegillis

I will be back on Twitter more. I haven’t felt well the last few days, and I realize today a friend of mine is getting married when I thought it was later in the month. However, we don’t really talk anymore so it’s very confusing. I have no animosity. I just want him to have a good life no matter what. If I’m in it or not. I’ll always be a lover not a fighter.

Fair judge? Clone her. I know there are others, just not enough.

I will fall on the sword if needed. I also don't send those types of pics all willy nilly... fool me once... @NancyMace the DM's are wide open

Doing my first headlining gig in November. Been hitting a lot of mics and working on new material. Stay tuned for more info!

The craziest secret that shouldn’t be a secret is @DerekPopeMusic

Just do a @miley x Jay-Z Super Bowl! Problem solved.

Wild timeline

A sentence I never thought I'd say: I'd kick it with @HunterBiden!

#ElonisaMartian trending is giving X a little more credit because it's a great hashtag. Undeniably.

Dude, if I was 14 my head would explode after seeing the Sydney Sweeney ad because that wouldn't be blocked on the old family computer.

RIP to a legend for his role in Home Alone 2 alone!

She's in New York. The Mayor doesn't even care.

This time used to be the best on twitter / X / Elon’s fun project / w/e

Some of you were so late to the male loneliness epidemic I had to dust off chairs for you. Yes, it shows.