old sole, New Shoes
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Joined November 2023
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coded_bruh retweeted
Modesty is the predisposition towards gratitude that comes from the awareness that you’re not entitled to things merely for existing and so whatever is freely given to you naturally elicits heartfelt gratitude for reducing your burden.
This is rarer to find in women than in men because our realities are starkly different (Men are hardly ever given free meals and so whatever kindness shown to a man is more likely to elicit genuine gratitude since he isn’t used to such).
There is a reason “as you should” and “bare minimum” are uniquely female-coded speaks.
They are narcissism induced phrases mirroring the general entitlement women feel with respect to male benevolence, an entitlement that does not stem from any prior correlative sacrifice so as to earn it, but merely from the fact of their existence, having received prior kindnesses from different men.
It is an arbitrary ego-inflation that increases their natural baseline expectation and prevents them showing any real gratitude because they’re merely getting what they “deserve”.
There is a reason Cicero described gratitude as “not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.”
Genuine gratitude is what provokes the continual flow of all other streams of kindness. It is the grease that oils the machine.
It inspires in the source the moral urge to “do more”, but quite ironically, also inspires in the beneficiary the moral urge to “give back”, and in doing this, symmetry is created that enriches both the giver and the recipient and the social contract is sustained.
This is why you must not negotiate modesty. You cannot truly continually sacrifice for a person who sees your effort as their due.
I will keep saying it, that parents have a lot of work to do on their children.
A lot of intentional effort has to go into raising a child.
Once dated a lady from a family that does not know how to say thank you.
Do something for the sister, and it is a bland thank you.
Do something for the brother, bland thank you.
Do something for the said lady herself; it's a bland thank you.
Whereas, I have met a lady who said:
"Babe, please lend me money. I promised my sister I would pay for her apprenticeship, but it is coming so suddenly, and I can only spare 30k now. Lend me 20k so I can sort her."
Asked how much, she said 50k.
Sent 100k to her, sort your sister, and keep the rest since you are not boxed up.
I wasn't expecting her to tell the sister, since she's in her big sis mode.
But to my surprise...
After sending epistle, she went ahead to tell the said sister I paid for it, and told the brother and the entire family texted me for the first time, to say thank you.
And was feeling almost embarrassed by "thank you."
If I do anything for my own siblings they will say thank you, pray for me, do same the following day, and they will even tell our parents.
And my parents will still call me to say thank you, and pray for me.
Most times, I wonder why.
But I have come to realize that it was how we were raised.
And checking through too...
The act of appreciating others very well for what they have done for us is a measure of how they have been raised.
coded_bruh retweeted
1K likes & counting. Reason this resonates with women is because they never imagine they could be the discarded wife. In their minds, they’re the lady getting flown out. And that solipsism is why they rarely condemn rotten behavior. They believe they’ll one day benefit from it.
It doesn’t always work like that oh☹️☹️
When I was working in the bank, one of my colleagues was dating a big man who happened to be one of our major customers. At the time, she still had her boyfriend so we all advised her to just chop the man’s money while maintaining her relationship. 😭
Six months into the relationship, she came to work one day and told us the man wanted to leave his wife and marry her we screamed.. We told her not to make that mistake because we were convinced that if he could leave his wife for her, he could also leave her for someone else.
She married him exactly one year into their relationship.
Fast-forward to when she had her first pregnancy, the man sponsored her to USA to have their first baby. she sent us chocolate and whenever I’m eating that chocolate, I feel like ntor 🥵😜was attached to it because imagined she listened to our advice? She for still dey do “next customer please with that red bank”
She has had her second child with the same man, got a brand-new car as a push present and her mum has travelled to the USA about five times now.
Omo, life don pass rich prince falling in love with village girl feem abeg..
Anytime I view her status, I’m always grateful that she followed her mind oh and never listen to us.
coded_bruh retweeted
"Educate the girl child"
"Empowerment for the girl child"
Again, I ask. What is the benefit of the education and empowerment if *MAJORITY* of them still end up thinking like this?
coded_bruh retweeted
I can imagine how hard it must be for young women dating 30+ men like us.
You send us fire jpegs and we go "you look good"
Then you have to question why we did not add emojis
And then question why we only view your status once in 6 months & rarely go past the first 2 frames
coded_bruh retweeted
If you think strong men are dangerous, wait till you see what weak men are capable of
Police Officer Sh%%ts Girlfriend De@d Over Relationship Problems Before Ending It All In Kogi State
A police corporal attached to the Ajaokuta Division of the Kogi State Police Command has allegedly sh%t his girlfriend, Woman Corporal Grace, de@d before taking his own life with an AK-47 rifle.
The incident reportedly occurred around 9 p.m. on October 23, 2026, although the circumstances surrounding the deaths have not been independently verified.
According to a source cited by SaharaReporters, Corporal Amos resumed night-duty station guard at about 6 p.m. but allegedly left his post hours later and went to Grace’s quarters, where he reportedly sh%t her several times before sh%%ting himself.
The source claimed Grace sustained g¥nsh%t wounds to her shoulder, lower abdomen and leg. The motive has not been officially established, but the account linked the incident to alleged relationship problems.
The officers had reportedly dated for years but began experiencing trust issues and cheating allegations in recent months. Their disagreements allegedly escalated into physical f+ghts and thre@ts, leading to their detention by the Divisional Crime Officer (DCO), who reportedly advised them to end the relationship.
The source said: “He reported on duty at about 6pm and disappeared few hours later and went straight to Grace’s quarters and m¥rdered her before k+lling himself also.
“The two junior police officers had been dating for some years now, but few months ago, they started having trust issues and cheating allegations. There had been physical f+ght and thre@ts to the extent they were detained at some point by the DCO who later advised them to end the love relationship for the sake of peace,” the source revealed.
Further details, including official confirmation of the de@ths and recovery of the we@pon, remain unavailable.
The Kogi State Police Command had yet to issue an official statement.
coded_bruh retweeted
During my service year I stumbled upon one babe around my area. We clicked instantly and became kinda "friends". On my way back from PPA I'd usually visit with Ice cream and other things she never asked for because she lived just a stone throw from me. So we kinda met almost everyday and I never showed up empty-handed.
On her part she always wanted to see me and ask for one advice or another as it didn't take me long to realise she was into business. As it wasn't costing me anything I just stuck around and tried to see life through her own eyes.
So one day at work I recieved a distress message from her for urgent 2k. She's never asked me for anything so I felt she must've reached rocked bottom. I'd have sent her 10k if she wanted, she was a genuinely nice soul (I thought lol), 30+ at the time, and not so much going on for her at the time so being a 23yo without frontal lobe I felt very sorry for her. I decided however since I was going to her home I'd just slip her the money and some extra personally instead of doing transfer. I had the cash on my already.
Fast forward to close of work I headed straight to her place. We greeted as usual and she explained how down bad she was, I comforted her saying I was her friend and will always give her a shoulder to lean on (ewu 😂). She then left to go take a shower because I just arrived unexpectedly. Well, she went out but left her phone near me unlocked. I couldn't resist snooping because messages kept trooping in endless.
So I picked up the phone and immediately started laughing. Me that has never had a female friend decided to befriend my neighbour and the outcome didn't shock me. It turned out the same distress message she sent me was forwarded to another 100+ men on her contact.
That is, it was only 2k. Assuming all 100+ men came through for her she'd be pocketing over 200k in a single day. My NYSC allowance was just 19k. I checked her account balance and she had over 100k since morning already, minus her previous balance. When I confronted her she started laughing, I was laughing harder. I was going to give my savings to somebody who was gonna milk me.
I left laughing and our "friendship" (or neighbourship??) continued because I had nothing to lose. But that sole experience reinforced my lifelong belief that while there's almost zero roi for a man in a relationship, a man keeping a female friend is on a suicide mission. Top 2 most idiotic financial decision any man can make in life.
coded_bruh retweeted
You know the ironic part of this statement?
She does not actually rate you even if you do this.
It is all responsibility borne from entitlement that does not produce gratitude or obligation.
Our fathers at least did shit like this for women who revered them and said thank you.
When you harm yourself trying to protect the modern woman, she’s gonna laugh over it with her friends and give you the most narcissistic-induced version of “as you should” or “bare minimum” for your efforts as a sacrificial lamb.
If you like don’t be wise.
coded_bruh retweeted
I have forgotten who said it and how it was said exactly but the guy was like “if you’re rich and nonchalant, you will always see a pussy to hit but if you’re not rich and is chalant enough, you could see one or two to hit but if you’re broke and is nonchalant nothing for you”
coded_bruh retweeted
You people criticise hos that sell sex for 5k telling them to charge 5 million like Sophia Egunje.
But you aren't telling 5k makeup artists to raise their prices but instead you're criticising the woman that charges 500k.
When it comes to your money you suddenly become wise. 😄
coded_bruh retweeted
The most bizarre thing I saw in Africa was a refugee camp in northern Kenya for South Sudanese families (Kakuma).
They all lived in tiny mud huts in the desert with few books, minimal grain sludge and unclean water.
Yet many had the latest iPhones, AirPods and Jordans…..in mud huts….
Turns out the entire economy was jumping the border into Uganda, smuggling stolen iPhones and fake shoes back into Kenya to sell to corrupt officials, then selling NGO resources to fund their desire to have iPhones themselves.
coded_bruh retweeted
Women are often very good at presenting intangible things like love, loyalty, emotional support, and companionship as their contribution to a relationship, while expecting tangible benefits like money, financial security, gifts, and a comfortable lifestyle from the man. The contradiction becomes obvious when you examine how each person’s contribution is measured: hers is often evaluated by how she makes him feel, while his is evaluated by what he can materially provide. In many relationships, the woman wants her intangible contributions to be appreciated as inherently valuable, yet expects the man’s tangible contributions to be treated as a basic obligation. This creates a double standard in which one person’s contribution is subjective and difficult to quantify, while the other’s is concrete, measurable, and financially demanding.
coded_bruh retweeted
His role is to “be a provider”.
Not abstract, not imaginary, not intangible, not invisible.
But your role is to “make him feel valued, loved, respected, and appreciated.” Very abstract, very imaginary, very invisible and very intangible qualities.
This is AbokiFx exchange rate.
Men and women are not the same, and I don’t believe they have to be.
Once I see that you’re trying to reverse roles, I naturally distance myself because that’s not the kind of dynamic I want.
Even in a relationship, I’m not a man, and I don’t intend to take on a man’s role. I don’t believe in 50/50 when it comes to finances. I can buy things for the house with my own money, give gifts, and contribute willingly, but I will not take over a man’s responsibility as a provider. My own role is to support him, make him feel valued, loved, respected, and appreciated.
There’s a difference between supporting a man and taking over his responsibilities. I know the kind of relationship I want, and I’m not going to compromise on that just to fit into someone else’s idea of a relationship.
