@chadselph

transit 🚈, tennis🎾, ultimate, chess♜, functional programming λ, karaoke 🎤,⚡️🚲,⚡️🛹 #bancars

 SF
chadselph.com
Joined May 2008
  • Tweets2K
  • Following395
  • Followers301
209Media
My favorite story from the Bible is when Baby Jesus was visited by the three wisemen, a modem, a Seahawks hat and 2 staplers. – at West Pasco, WA
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Week 15 RPS Rankings AP Poll 1. Rock 2. Scissors 3. Paper Coaches Poll 1. Scissors 2. Rock 3. Paper – at San Francisco, CA
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Rock’s loss to paper was a quality loss
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Love reading "Customer questions & answers" on Amazon when the answerer misunderstood the point of the question.
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We don’t talk enough about how from the mall we can take a train that goes to a park, a zoo, or the ocean.
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I got this ad in the mail; some kind of bougie chia pet?! Ch-ch-ch-likhâ – at San Francisco, CA
Pitch for horror movie: an evil murderous spirit you can only see through an AR app – at Manhattan, NY
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Being too high to perform Afroman because I got high at karaoke is kinda on-brand – at Manhattan, NY
The DJ has a QR code for his venmo. What’s the worst song you can request for $4?
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For $4 Wasn’t me by shaggy took 20 minutes but for $2.76 Gasolina by Daddy Yankee wasn’t played immediately
Everyone is posting such awesome #dalle images meanwhile I'm just getting nightmares
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I wish the way to get red wine stains out was to pour white wine on it – at Barnstable Town, MA
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Chad Selph retweeted
Liron Shapira
@liron4 Jun 2022
Yesterday @packyM was asked to explain a Web3 use case. I clipped this gem from 8:40 of @loganbartlett's latest @cartoonavatars podcast episode with co-host @zachweinberg. Highly recommended...
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Weirdest spam text yet
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These whatsapp scam messages are getting increasingly specific and weird
Oh you want cilantro? We only sell it in the "lifetime supply" quantity and it will be rotten within 2 hours of bringing it home
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Do you remember when you joined Twitter? I don’t! #MyTwitterAnniversary – at San Francisco, CA
This car has been honking for the last 2 minutes and I can hear it from a block away.
OH. MY. @EAbogidi 📺| ESPN+ 📱| pac12.me/MBB-WSU-SMU #GoCougs | #RoadToTheGarden
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This is why we can’t have nice things 😭
SFMTA@SFMTA_Muni11 Mar 2022
ATTN: IB/OB #subwaysvc delayed at Civic Center due to a report of an intruder in the tunnel. We are preparing to conduct a safety check in both directions.
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