m.p retweeted
Putting Kamala Harris as VP into perspective.See the red box? Until then, she would have been enslaved.See the blue box? Until then, she couldn’t vote. Yellow box? Until then, she had to attend a segregated school.
The green one? Until then she couldn’t have her own bank account
m.p retweeted
If I say “Black Lives Matter” and your response is “All Lives Matter” I find that very frustrating. It’s like if I asked “what’s 2+2” and you said “it isn’t 3” you’re not wrong but, that isn’t a solution to the problem.
m.p retweeted
Medical lab tech Katie Corley coughed on two petri dishes, one while wearing a mask, and one without a mask. (From her public FB post.)
So for my birthday do I make everyone I know party with me on club penguin or runescape?
61%Club Penguin NO CONTEST
39%Runescape you plebeian
23 votes • Final results m.p retweeted
This is Ringo. He appreciates your urge to pet him, but respectfully asks you to keep your distance until this is all over. 12/10 I will do my best sir
m.p retweeted
The federal government will end funding for coronavirus testing sites on Friday. While some sites will transition to being state-managed, others will close as a result. This as criticism continues that not enough testing is available.
n.pr/2y35sNu
One good thing to come out of this quarantine is that my brand of humor does well in group chats only
m.p retweeted
Since we don't have any sports, here's a play-by-play of me walking our 15 year-old basset hound. Hint: She's SLOW
m.p retweeted
College seniors, take it from me: you don't need a commencement ceremony to sit outside in the blazing heat, pretending you're not hungover.
m.p retweeted
While humans carry out social distancing, a group of 14 elephants broke into a village in Yunan province, looking for corn and other food. They ended up drinking 30kg of corn wine and got so drunk that they fell asleep in a nearby tea garden. 😂
m.p retweeted
American companies denying workers paid sick leave:
McDonald's - 517K workers
Walmart - 347K workers
Kroger - 189K workers
Subway - 80K workers
Burger King - 165K workers
Pizza Hut: - 156K workers
Target - 51K workers
Marriott - 139K workers
Wendy's - 133K workers
m.p retweeted
This is Ned. He’ll be conducting your check-pup today. Please don’t giggle when you see him. He’s $232,000 in debt from medical school and would appreciate some respect. 13/10

























