It’s a business doing pleasure with you 💋

Los Angeles, CA
Joined March 2009
Asking the karaoke guy if I can do the “I am your mother” monologue from Hereditary
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It’s always his shirt ripping but never his pants like lemme see that big green cock
Spider-Man Brand New Day (2026)
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Bree Essrig retweeted
just drove my chevy all the way to the levy. you’re not gonna fucking believe this.
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Bree Essrig retweeted
lift ten times your weight. voraciously consume sugary liquids. kill anyone who doesnt smell like you. ant mode.
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Bree Essrig retweeted
7
どの体型の男性と結婚したい?
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Me mistaking politeness for affection and desire for friendship
A bear mistakes the vet's attempt to measure its body for a hug 🥹
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Bree Essrig retweeted
was getting my cooter touched on and this guy goes ‘this feels like petting a stingray’ girl fuck you
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Bree Essrig retweeted
No sorry I can’t hang out I have to get really sad in my room later
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Bree Essrig retweeted
remembering the day i downloaded letterboxd and marked every movie i’d ever watched as watched
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Bree Essrig retweeted
i genuinely hate that this is my type of humor
When they discover a cure for blindness:
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'unbecoming' is such a good word. not only was that thing you did bad but it also made you less.
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Bree Essrig retweeted
beauty and the beast furniture becoming human again
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Bree Essrig retweeted
no one warns you that a good thrift find will turn you into a dog returning to same bush every week to find a pizza crust like that one time three years ago & never since
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Bree Essrig retweeted
Everything is performative to chronic underachievers.
People that read books on the train are lowkey kinda performative 😭
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Bree Essrig retweeted
you open this app and for .5 seconds you’re granted access to what might be the most fascinating sentence ever constructed in human history before the timeline refreshes and it’s lost forever
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Bree Essrig retweeted
doing a perfect wilhelm scream when i cum
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he said he wanted to try #goatmilk so i put my titty in his mouth
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Bree Essrig retweeted
i love rubbing my tip against the clit🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤paid partnership with TURNING POINT USA
🤝 Paid partnership · 🤖 Made with AI
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Bree Essrig retweeted
The Pervert would like a chat with you.
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Bree Essrig retweeted
el ibuprofeno viendo todo el dolor que llevo dentro
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well turn it off please
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