angst&anguish

and i'm sorry i left, but it was for the best though it never felt right

the worst thing that i ever did was what i did to you

for a week, i have wanted to be broken in your hands, offering nothing in return

not everything feels like something else

i will not let go of what is mine

everything is more beautiful because we are doomed

and that’s how it feels, it hurts, it’s like i lost you before i was born

i became bitter and untouchable. i craved affection but even the mere thought of someone caring made my stomach turn

and maybe in another life you and i will get it right

to feel anything deranges you. to be seen feeling anything strips you naked

i have stopped believing that secrets are a beautiful way to die

sorry for the mess i left you but i don't want it back i don't need it back

when can i say your name and have it mean only your name and not what you left behind?

i'm homesick for myself

i need you to be a monster which is to say, i am trying not to love you

you changed me, you should remember me

days will pass, and you’ll abandon things you were addicted to, and leave someone, and cancel a dream, and finally, accept a reality.

my silences had not protected me. yours will not protect you.

when i am dead, it will not matter how hard you press your ear to the ground.

childhood? which childhood? the one that didn’t last? the one in which you learned to be afraid?