@_qolden

AHHHHH!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! he/him, adult, side for @dominicpage_

 qolden on ao3
Joined July 2026
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okay here's a more succinct pinned post strawpage: qoldenskies.straw.page/ ao3: archiveofourown.org/users/qo… main: @dominicpage_ since i answer so many strawpage asks, i'll qrt all art i make in the replies of this one, so you have an easy way to look at it in one place ↓↓↓↓

qoldenskies's strawpage

qoldenskies.straw.page
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learning a lot of people actually relate to this is both reassuring and really sad
qolden@_qolden17h
jax's death actually scared me back into the closet and i think im the one trans person ive ever seen that she did that to, so like. yeah its really complicated for me
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not an insult to jax's writing at all, trans people arent a monolith and its kind of inevitable that its not gonna hit right for some of us, and i wont undermine the positive impact her story had on a lot of people. but damn like.... it does suck :( i hope it'll get better for us
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this passage from stained glass. no further comment
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jax calls pomni pampering her chivalry and she calls pomni a gentleman. in my heart of hearts
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she actually made my little sister come out so i cannoooot discredit her impact. unfortunately she just hit VERY wrong for me LMAO
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i actually deal with some like unfathomable internalized transphobia i dont think i'll ever feel comfortable talking about publicly (like repeated hysterical panic attacks when thinking about how i want to be a man type shit) and her story did not hit me right. i love her though
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she interacted really badly with my own personal baggage but sometimes i kinda project what i want from myself onto her when i write her getting better and that's helped me a little bit
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jax's death actually scared me back into the closet and i think im the one trans person ive ever seen that she did that to, so like. yeah its really complicated for me
qolden@_qolden17h
I wrote where my armor ends
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its a very "fix your heart or die" kind of message but when youre really exhausted all the time and cant do anything about it sometimes youre just like Damn alright.... guess i'll die.... but im like that about transitioning
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its a message needed for a lot of trans people but i was not one of them i guess LMAO
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I wrote where my armor ends
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it feels like a very angry? narrative choice considering the wider story and its themes. but i get what it was going for.. so yeah... themes and such...... its just. definitely not what i would have done LMAO
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i love writing tragedy but seeing jax's death in isolation in an overall power of friendship Hopium story makes it feel just. angry. like the dissonance of it all. like damn you were not lying about this being used to exorcise your demons 😭😭😭 but yeah its complicated
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ik people laughed a little while ago at the idea of zooble being a main character since that was stated in the artbook but lowkenuinely they drove the plot as much as pomni did. they felt like a very present force in the story from episode 5 onward especially
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kinger glaze kinda got co-opted by weird right wingers can everyone start aggressively glazing zooble instead Theyre literally the best i love zooble
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do you guys remember when they had that big moment with the grenades in episode 6 and had that "this was all real" speech in episode 7 and got singled out at the beginning of episode 8 because they felt heartbroken over never getting to leave. THEY GET A LOT OF FOCUS!!
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i dont consider jax's death atonement or consequence for her actions because i think thats a very risky way to perceive suicide. but i do think its relevant that she lost ALL of her power over everybody by the time that happened because of zooble, thats definitely Consequences
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as complicated as my feelings are on the choice are, i dont think her death was meant to feel like consequence. i definitely think you're meant to feel dissatisfied because of how many loose ends she never gets to tie up and how she doesnt get to change. because its a tragedy-
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-by design
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