@WhyChrisBrain

Failed Human Experiment

 No idea
Joined March 2009
  • Tweets71.5K
  • Following902
  • Followers1.5K
4.9KMedia
Who called it social anxiety and not the meet sweats?
6
1
25
For fuck's sake, give him the Billy T Award!
Acyn
@AcynOct 22
Trump: I didn't get the Nobel Prize. I didn't get the Pulitzer. I should have gotten the Pulitzer for writing too.
43
Gulf of Mexico = Gulf of America Lake Ontario = Lake America Defenestrating, poisoning, war criminal = Humanitarian What a time to be alive. For now.
Ron Filipkowski
@RonFilipkowskiOct 21
Trump’s special envoy Steve Witkoff to Vladimir Putin today: “You talk so much about Trump being a humanitarian, you are a humanitarian also, sir. And I salute that. I commend you.”
28
There are two kinds of people in the world. Those with a favourite pair of socks and wrong'uns.
1
41
I'm not book smart, or magazine smart. I'm barely pamphlet smart.
1
39
I'm not street smart, or cul-de-sac smart. I'm barely unmarked bush trail smart.
7
I like to vote like I order at the drive-thru. Last minute panic followed by years of regret.
1
1
49
How can you regret a drive-thru order for years? Practice.
11
In my PJs, Uggs, watching a quirky British murder mystery series, and eating delicious sandwiches I made. Bezos & Musk got fuckall on me right now.
37
OJ?
Aaron Rupar
@atruparOct 21
Trump: "He stood up and violently slashed her neck. Almost cut her head right off. Slashed it violently and viciously. For those people who are able to handle that kind of stuff, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Very rarely do you see it run behind the actual, almost hit. Her head was barely attached"
29
I think Ivanka may have thoughts about being doxxed like that.
Spencer Hakimian
@SpencerHakimianOct 20
JUST IN: Donald Trump announces he is looking into launching a dating app for MAGA men
37
The music video for INXS' "Never Tear Us Apart" gives me real "Mission Impossible" vibes, only with significantly more heroin.
34
RFK w H C-Y.
Rolling Stone
@RollingStoneOct 19
A controversial hepatitis B study was recently funded by the CDC in spite of global criticism. A WHO spokesperson tells @KatherineEban, "The study is unethical.” rollingstone.com/politics/po…

How a Controversial Hepatitis B Study Was Funded by the CDC Amid a Global Swirl of Criticism

As experts questioned the ethics of the study, documents show that expiring funds forced a rushed vote in Denmark, where the researchers’ institute is based

rollingstone.com
20
I'm having an existential crisis over whether I'm having an existential crisis or existential crises.
34
Do data centres at least have chimneys that the likes of us can sweep?
39
Gorillaz may be the one exception to the universal Z instead of an S is totally fucked rule.
34
It's not exactly "For Sale: Baby shoes. Never worn." but booking a flight to Christchurch for 24 hours is right up there.
38
I bought some Weetbix, which I'm told is a better breakfast than shiraz. Time will tell.
1
43
Using Baileys instead of milk would expunge the benefit though, right?
11
My main thought when watching modern football is; what EVER the fuck happened to grass burns? #COYS
50
All of a sudden I'm Michael Bolton in "Office Space" when "Fuck Tha Police" comes up on my playlist at home.
35
Load more