I've been suffering from Lyme disease. I'm stepping back from xAI into an informal advisory role so I can go founder mode on my health, starting today. --- The symptoms started when I got sick (cold, flu, or COVID -- I'm not sure which) in early 2025. I distinctly felt less energetic, less creative, and less agentic even weeks after "recovery." After that, my condition ebbed and flowed, but the lows kept getting lower. Accidentally eating the wrong thing would make me extremely tired, taking days to recover. Working out would leave my whole body feeble for days. There was a week where I slept 12 hours a day and still couldn't recover. Lyme is famously hard to diagnose, but luckily I have an incredible doctor. He suspected these symptoms, far from being just in my head, indicated immune issues. Detective work over a few rounds of testing revealed I have Lyme disease. I was very surprised because Lyme is said to come from tick bites (where the bump looks like a target), but I don't ever remember having one. Likely I contracted Lyme a long time ago, but until I pushed myself hard building xAI and weakened my immune system, the symptoms weren't noticeable. --- Overall, I actually feel lucky to have discovered this early. Lyme is a serious disease that only gets harder to treat with age -- patients discovering it in their 50s or 60s have a much tougher time. Lyme can also be debilitating, leaving its victims bedridden, but luckily I'm still functional and can take care of myself day to day. So while some folks have said "you shouldn't have pushed yourself so hard," I'm glad I did. I found this issue early, and now I can fix it so I can push myself even harder when I rebound. --- Chronic Lyme is not well understood in the literature or by the public. For folks suffering from it, it can be a lonely fight. But I hope my story can make it just a little less lonely.

unboxing my boiled eggs to see which Pokémons I got

"Most importantly, you'll own everything: the hardware it runs on, the data it learns from, and the intelligence itself." 🥰

snek

some time ago I noticed i can feel a bit tired after eating macadamia just now, a mold sniffing dog smelled mold in them!

is it just me or ginseng strip 2002 *still* sounds like its made by an incomprehensibly advanced civilization

I technically don't have lyme any more! according to IgeneX that just came back, lyme IgM bands improved 23++, 41+ (Jan) -> 23++ (now) which is technically negative for borrelia burgdorferi in both IGX and CDC/NYS criteria (tho band 23 is much more specific to lyme than band 41) the relapsing fever variant has also turned negative for both IgM and IgG --- however, the co-infections! babesia is still positive (but improved(?) from FISH positive to FISH negative but IgG positive) bartonella is still indeterminate which likely means positive if I follow up with a Galaxy Diagnostics --- overall, I'm pleasantly surprised because I haven't done any antibiotics (but I did intend to see if I can recover without antibiotics) the main intervention with plausible biological contribution is maraviroc otherwise I felt it's mostly just trigger identification and avoidance + symptom relief, and letting my body do its job(?) --- in any case, I still have symptoms (possibly explained by continued presence of bartonella) and there's still some ways to go but this is consistent with my energy level improvements so far!

placebo is a hell of a drug

jackzebra low key tuff

my energy has improved gradually over time by mid May I could micromanage my life to feel normal (energy 7) but robustness is still not there: energy dipped after I loosened up after mid May and trying some new interventions nevertheless I feel things are improving under the hood! very grateful for all that I've learned on this journey so far 🙏

my left achilles is flaring up again and Lenin pulls up on my ice pack what mean????

can't wait to see what @river_ai_inc will build!

my 2nd oura ring just borked today 💀 lasted not even 6 months at least the 1st one lasted till right after the warranty ended 🤣

so grateful I can go wherever whenever once again!

last Monday (~2 weeks ago) I still got a "crash is coming" feeling after 6 minutes of rowing machine (fortunately didn't lead to a crash after resting immediately) then 3 days later I was able to bike for an hour recovery is just so nonlinear!

hiked up and down a mountain, no post exertional malaise! still wearing an abdominal binder, and there were some stretches hot in the sun that I felt a POTS type strain, but hydration and brief rest took care of that WHAT A FEELING TO BE ALIVE

curing yourself of a mentally debilitating disease is like the hardest continual learning benchmark

tried a mandibular advancement device for the last few months for sleep apnea moved my jaw forward too much; my back teeth haven't touched in a long time also i would get TMJ cramps at night sometimes so now i have to stop and do the "blowfish" and the "thinker" exercises to move my jaw back

my food sensitivities have all but gone since I took my 1hr nature bike ride last Thursday literally breakfast that day I was still feeling sensitivities, then I went on that ride and came back and had raw fish for the first time in a while and it was totally fine even though I expected it would create histamine issues for me ever since then I have been able to eat whatever I want even gluten, eggs, dairy that I avoided for 2 years my mental model is that a lot of the stuff I've been doing (avoiding triggers from food/chemicals/POTS, supportive supplements, medications like maraviroc / statin, neurofeedback, etc) have been fixing lot of underlying issues but my nervous system was still stuck in "fight or flight" and the nature fixed this mismatch

interestingly, ever since I fasted for a few days from april 9 my respiratory rate has dropped permanently I have not fasted since april 19

I just figured out i can trigger a bliss feeling at will by "pulling up from the heart" it can target anything and I will feel grateful for it I felt this feeling last week (for the first time in a long time) while biking in nature, but coming back to an urban environment it naturally vanishes but i was able to trigger it when I went to the park and sat on the grass, and from there, trial and error, I found the way above to trigger at will I think this feeling probably was a big factor in lifting my PEM energy ceiling