TMason🐀

In 2016, I got into an argument with a gay man on a menswear forum. I have since made it my mission to make every man dress gay, thereby reducing his ability to tell who is gay and thus reduce his ability to find love. I have built a following of 1.5M followers for this mission.

I give out free menswear advice. As a result, I've received about a hundred emails in the last three years from people who shared their wedding-day photos and said they incorporated my advice. They all look fantastic — truly like a million, billion bucks. It makes me happy that they will look back on those photos and smile for decades to come, knowing they looked perfect. Additionally, because I put information out for free—never hawking it through some paid subscription newsletter or "buy my supplements" scam, like most influencers—I've been fortunate to grow a sizable audience. I've used this audience to raise over $100k for various animal welfare organizations, which is a cause I care about. Thus, by helping people get married, I've indirectly improved the birthrate in this country and employed some tailors in the process. This, in turn, has helped me raise money for animals. Unlike Jake Paul, I've never used my platform to enrich or aggrandize myself.

I disagree. I think it is you, not me, who is lost. This silhouette belongs in a delicious Asian soup, not a cobblestone street. Hence, you are in the wrong location.