As I sit here, drowning in my own tears, I keep thinking about the life I used to have—and how much I miss it. This is what my life looks like lately. 💔 Day after day, lying in this same bed, surrounded by the same four walls, just trying to make it through another day. And I’m going to be honest… I’m so incredibly tired of living like this. I’m tired of waking up every morning feeling sick before the day even starts. Tired of being exhausted when I haven’t even done anything. Tired of my body making even the simplest things feel impossible. I’m tired of watching life happen around me while I’m stuck here, missing out on so much. I miss being independent. I miss being a nurse. I miss being the step mom and spouse I used to be. I miss getting up and going somewhere just because I feel like it. I miss having plans, having energy, having a purpose outside of managing this illness. I miss ME. # Living with severe Long COVID, ME/CFS, dysautonomia, and everything else that has come along with it has taken so much more from me than I ever could have imagined. And what people don’t always see is the emotional toll of spending nearly every day confined to a bed, not knowing when—or if—things will ever improve. I spend so much of my limited energy researching treatments, advocating for myself, fighting insurance battles, coordinating medical care, and trying to find something, ANYTHING, that might help me get some part of my life back. It’s exhausting. And some days, like today, I just don’t have it in me to put a positive spin on any of this. I don’t want to keep living like this. I want to actually LIVE again. I want to get out of this bed. I want to enjoy my family, take my dog to the park, spend time outside, and experience the little things that most people probably don’t think twice about. I’m not asking for some extraordinary life. I just want the opportunity to enjoy an ordinary one again. Today, I’m not looking for advice or reminders to stay positive. I’m just sharing what the reality of severe chronic illness feels like sometimes. Because I don’t want to just survive my life. I want to live it. 💔 #LongCOVID #MECFS #SevereMECFS #ChronicIllness #Bedbound #InvisibleIllness #DisabilityAwareness