Sheldon Cooper

You have GOT to be kidding me...

May the fourth be with you. #MayTheFourthBeWithYou #StarWarsDay

Bazinga!

✌🏻Cuts✋🏻 ✋🏻Covers👊🏻 👊🏻Crushes👌🏻 👌🏻Poisons🖖🏻 🖖🏻Smashes✌🏻️ ✌🏻Decapitates👌🏻 👌🏻Eats✋🏻 ✋🏻Disproves🖖🏻 🖖🏻Vaporises👊🏻, As it always has 👊🏻Crushes✌🏻️

You can tell the gender of any Ant by throwing it in the water. If it sinks = girl ant If it floats = buoyant Bazinga!

Check out my tan line.

It's all about perspective. For instance the sinking of the Titanic was a blessing to the lobsters in the ship's kitchen.

Soft kitty, Warm kitty, Little ball of fur. Happy kitty, Sleepy kitty, Purr, purr, purr.

Bazinga!

Oh Cemistree, oh Chemistree...

I think the tree needs more lights, it's a bit on the dark side.

You can tell the gender of an Ant by throwing it in the water, If it sinks = Girl Ant If it floats = Buoyant.

Hello? Is this thing on?

If you're having a bad day, just remember in 1976 Ronald Wayne sold his 10% stake in Apple for $2,300. It is now worth $59,565,410,309.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sunflowers are yellow. I bet you were expecting something romantic but no, just some gardening facts.

Bazinga. That is all.

So, Chris Evans is the new Top Gear host, I hope they get the other Avengers too.

I like sleeping. It's like death without the commitment.

THEY'RE going THERE with THEIR friends. Seriously, it's not rocket science. Bazinga.