Lenovo is going to be so pissed when they figure out which half of Motorola Google just sold them.

I dunno, Google, my reality is already about as augmented as it gets.

Heavy: "Jason Calacanis @Jason is now following you (@RealCalacanis)."

Reliable sources tell me @justinbieber got his lip pierced earlier tonight. You heard it here first. #bieber

Despite the name change, Google Buzz is straight killing it, just like I said it would.

I used to care about #demo but I cured that conference. With MY MIND. #tigerblood

If calling out haters during a "manic episode" is cool, call me Miles Davis #tigerblood

Fine, well I'm not covering any Disrupt startups in my newsletter. #mutuallyassureddestruction

FACT: More people buy me gifts today than on any other day of the year. Be a part of it!

No, I'm not selling Mahalo to Google for $4 billion. I'll consider SERIOUS offers, but happy to keep crushing it for dolo.

If Mahalo sells for > $1 billion, you'll know it's a talent acquisition of moi. #thefredwilsonparadox

Shit. This just isn't my week. #dmfail

DDM @keitholbermann Soooo, I hear you're looking for work. Got a newsletter I think you'd be perfect for. Call me.

Exactly what I told them RT @chrislhayes not filling in on Countdown because I didn't feel comfortable doing it given the circumstances.

Mike @arrington is so full of shit -- I gave him Provigil to help him develop joint IP, not to beat fucking jetlag.

"Only accident for $GOOG cars was when one of them was rear-ended while stopped at an intersection." Fuck you @google, the light was green.

Sorry, @arrington, but you don't get to 5 million monthly page views without making a few enemies. http://bit.ly/1pTaN

Really excited for the Twitter community. Huge opportunity for them having me here now.