At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country, localized entirely within your kitchen?!
Yeehaw Junction
Joined November 2014
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- Following196
- Followers496
- Likes7.9K
Pinned Tweet
Bae: come over
Me: cant, contemplatin surrealism and the abstract concept of thought
Bae: my parents arent here
Me: is anyone really "here"?
Sam Packer retweeted
When I came to Congress, I knew I had a responsibility to pull back the curtain for the American people and expose corruption in real time. So, I’m filling you in on Senator McConnell’s attempts over the last 8 days to tank a *bipartisan* COVID relief bill. (THREAD)
8th grade me happily sang the preamble to the constitution in front of his ENTIRE class without a second thought, and here I am today, nervous about giving a 5 minute presentation to my boss over the most basic concepts of what I studied for 4 years. Where did it all go wrong
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Step 1: Think about how cool it would be to be able to move objects with only your mind
Step 2: Realize that’s exactly what you’re already doing when you raise and lower your arm or leg
Step 3: Have panic attack
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Nothing like the cyclical bastardization of new meme formats by career based Instagram accounts to remind you even if the horse has been dead for 3 seconds, someone who loves their job a little too much will be waiting with a bat.
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Sam Packer retweeted
Alex Trebek Politely Listens To Lame Anecdote About Time Archangel Saw Bear bit.ly/2Ue66iE
Commercial idea: “Rawr xD girl” in a Subaru Forester.
SubUwU “what’s this? O.o *notices your 12 JD Power & Associates awards for initial quality*
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@ all of the random Europeans still following me from years ago after one of my tweets blew up in the UK
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