Today I was debating a MAGA, and I was certain I was going to win. I had facts on my side. I had receipts. I had video evidence. And then, they reached deep and found the most remarkable comeback I've ever heard. "TDS!" they said. "You have Trump Derangement Syndrome." Apparently, TDS is this disease where you disagree just because Donald Trump bombs boats on the high seas, commits war crimes, starts random wars, bombs schools with little girls, protects rapists and pedophiles, was best friends with Jeffrey Epstein, was convicted of 34 felonies, was found liable for sexual assault, posted racist pictures of the Obamas as apes, tore down half the White House, startd a trade war with the entire world (including an island of penguins), supported genocide, started a war that drove up inflation, cut health care for poor Americans, took the food from hngry children both in America and around the world, sold pardons to cartel leaders and people who laundered money for them and human traffickers, tried to ammend the Constitution with an Executive Order, called soldiers who died in war "suckers and losers," quoted Hitler on multiple occasions, made a man who cuddles with severed racoon road kill peises in charge of our health, said he loves inflation, threatend to invade Greenland mulitple times, pissed off Canada (how do you piss of Canada?), literally turned Washinton DC into a swamp, made billions of dollars off of being President, ran around naming things after himself, made the 250th Anniversary of the country about himself, violated the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 8th, 9th, 10th, 11th, 12th, 14th, 15th, 19th, 24th, and 26th Amendments, as well as Articles I, II, III, and IV of the Constitution in many and varied ways, has had more judicial rulings against him than any President in history, tried to overthrow the contry, tried to make it illegal to charge him with a crime while prosecuting people for such infractions as posting pictures of seashells, humiliated us on the world front numerous times, including a fantasy AI shot of the Prime Minister of Italy giving him googly eyes, ruind the World Cup by trying to rig it, and spawned the likes of Donald Jr. and Eric. But incredibly. With just three letters, all of that just MAGICALLY goes away. Poof. Like it never happened. Apparently, this is caused by a combination of immersing oneself in something called "objective reality" and reading things called "books." If you do those things, you might wanna get yourself checked for this "TDS" thing. Fortunately, it's very easy to diagnose. All you have to do is open your eyes. If you're not staring at the inside of your own colon, there's a very good chance you have it. The treatment is a steady diet of Fox News. The treatment works better if you have the volume turned all the way up. If you start realizing that colleges are teaching people to reject Starbucks cups that say "Merry Christmas" and that you should only accept the "Happy Holidays" ones, then the treatment is working. If that doesn't work, slamming your head in the door multiple times might beat the sense out of it. If you know someone affected by TDS, please share this post.