Nadine Victoria

Nothing sums up marriage in the pandemic better than when I tried out a new perfume and my husband sniffed me and said “hmm.. that doesn’t smell like your dry shampoo” #ok #noted

Me: Wow it’s so nice to wake up to sunlight again! Daylight Savings: lol ya we’re not doing that anymore. Instead we’re going to make it extremely bright when you’re trying to put your kids to bed 🙃

I’ve been locked out of my twitter account since 2019 and I’m back baby! So, wow 2020 eh.... woof.

RAPS!!!!!!!!!!! *goes dark for another 6 months* 👋🏻

Loving that my baby’s newest words are “oh woooow”. Huge confidence boost when someone says that at literally anything you do #thankyoufornoticing

Wow, letting your mind wander while showering is dangerous. Like, how long have I been in here? Have I washed my hair? Have I washed it 3 times? #lather #rinse #repeat ?

If #TheBachelor could just cut out these painfully awkward viewing parties and get to the painfully awkward limo entrances, that’d be great #thankunext

The way my 9 month old “talks”/yells, falls down and cries, is drawing many parallels to a real house wife after too much Chardonnay #shhhh

If you’re planning on going to the Toronto outlets today: don’t. Just passed the 5 kilometre line up for the exit. Saving money on Boxing Day is cool but have you ever saved your own sanity and 5 hours of line ups? #saveyourselves

Incase anyone’s wondering, parenting is just learning a game, getting kinda good at it, only for the rules to change the next day. Also, the game pukes on you.

The best eyelashes are wasted on men and certain breeds of dogs 😒

Thoughts on #MakingaMurderer 2: *everything is fucked*, Zellner is a boss but should maybe slow on the plastic surgery, & someone needs to move in to care for Mama and Papa Avery

Was having a rough day until overhearing a little boy tell his mom about his teacher farting in class today. Super engaging story teller 10/10 felt like I was there

I wish my baby looked at me the way she looks at my coffee. Or my cellphone. Or anything remotely breakable #itsfine #ionlybirthedyou

And I can’t take my eyes off these two 😍 #luckymom

I don’t care who you are, when the leaves change colours, were all just basic girls living in a #PSL world 🍂

If you didn’t know that you can extend the life of your avocados about 5 days by simply keeping them in the fridge, then I probably just changed your life.

In efforts to make them symmetrical, my number 1 favourite eyebrow has slowly started looking like number 2 eyebrow, and honestly I’m not sure which one I’m more upset with... #notmad #justdissapointed

The only person worthy of ending my 6 month twitter silence is GROCERY 👏🏻 STORE 👏🏻 JOE 👏🏻 He is America’s Sweetheart #GroceryStoreJoe #UncleJoey #IneedmoreJoe @BachParadise @ABCNetwork