The real question this year is does Rudolph have to wear the mask over his nose? He should, as it is the proper way to wear a mask, but would hinder his ability to light the way. This year has ruined everything.

Teach your children the joys of adulthood and tax by taking 30% of their advent calendar chocolate every morning.

The best thing about Christmas is when the scissors glide through the wrapping paper and for a moment you feel like a master seamstress in the 18th century cutting silk for a gown to be worn by royalty. Also roast potatoes.