Sardonic, wannabe author who probably should have been a comedian. Or a weatherman. Instead I work at a college.

Joined July 2010
Replying to @NBCNews
She's wearing the traditional Slovenian divorce dress.
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Digger is The Lone Ranger of Ishtar’s.
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“Is this Heaven?” “No. It’s Atlanta.”
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Erik Miller finished the season going 4 1/3 innings for the Red Sox with a 12.47 ERA and a 2.56 WHIP. Why bring him in there?
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From this point forward he will be known as “Drake Meh” (Patriots will be lucky to win 7 games this year)
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My dad when I put on any music older than 1962…
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My wife when I put in a new roll of toilet paper and recycle the prior empty roll.
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I’m guessing Susan Collins will put out a statement saying this report about her taking bribes has her “concerned about Susan Collins.”
Exclusive: In late 2024, FBI agents were looking at Sen. Susan Collins’ role in a massive illegal bribery scheme alleged by a former federal contractor. Then Trump gutted the FBI and DOJ, leaving no one to carry on the investigation – it’s dead. 🧵
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My wife when I take her wool sweater out before putting the clothes in the dryer.
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Good Good Golf: “My God, we just made the worst ad of the last twenty years.” Converse: “Hold my beer!”
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Just an idea for the Lions. GUARD OLAVE!!!
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Hey Scott Hansen - NFL Redzone might need to start your “every touchdown scored today” montage a bit early today. Gonna take a while.
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Life is good! NFL 2026
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Well the Seattle Seahawks have now ended the Patriots’ season two years in a row.
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Come on umps! I know it’s hot and Red Sox are up 5-2. But he was safe at second.
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In Bryce Miller’s last 8 games he has an ERA of 7.02 and a WHIP of 1.58. He’s gone 6 innings just once and given up 4 runs or more in 6 of them. And today the Red Sox are making him look like a Cy Young candidate.
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How is it possible for the Red Sox to have such awful pitching outside of their top 3? This team, though it had a great run in July, isn’t a legit threat for the postseason.
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No runner in baseball would have scored on that hit. What on Earth was the Red Sox 3rd base coach thinking there?
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Me when my wife picks a Vegetarian resteraunt for dinner.
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It’s so bad right now that if you showed up at a hospital with vomiting and diarrhea they would ask you “what HAVEN’T you eaten this week?” Thanks Trump and RFK!
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https://xitter.cf/t.co/DQ6k94x9EV Secret Service near Trump when he lets one go in his diaper.
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