Stand-Up Comedian Enquiries: @utcartistmgmt: [email protected] #MUFC fan. Watch my specials on https://xitter.cf/t.co/56a5honsaz

South London, United Kingdom
Joined April 2010
Dream come true
28
47
32
378
200,240
Hard to see anyone better than PSG
4
995
Lisandro Martínez did NOT hold back after United's loss to Atletico 😬👀
2,286
16,215
5,457
138,924
19,702,527
If you’re going to be racist, be good looking
14
1
122
10,421
Kae Kurd retweeted
I’ve seen Blank Peng perform standup live, and she’s hilarious. So awkward, stop starty, each punchline is like a heavy stab by a clumsy swordfighter, but they do serious damage. I can’t recommend the experience enough
in china he’s massive gay
2
1
10
2,226
This is like watching two drunk dudes arguing
1
4
16
1,369
We cannot play against 10 men. Just cannot.
2
2
13
1,237
Best player is our rb, says it all really.
8
1,016
Kae Kurd retweeted
Great evening at the patch mk the wonderful @KaeKurd was so good ! Made a spooky evening very funny xx
2
1
75
1,910
Kae Kurd retweeted
Replying to @KaeKurd
Ironically the spending cap for teams in formal 1 is one of the most heavily regulated and scrutinised in the world. The analogy utterly fails. Engineering gaps are more like Arsenal exploiting the rule around holding in the penalty box, or Brentford with long throws.
1
1
1
511
I don’t think people spending more money and sham deals is the same as finding engineering loopholes to be honest
I watched the F1 film with Brad Pitt the other day, and there’s a moment where his character asks to add something to the car that isn’t really in the rules. The FIA punishes it, but the team can still race with the earlier car. It made me think. In F1, the best teams live at the edge of the regulations. Sometimes the FIA allows what they’ve found, and sometimes it says that goes too far. Occasionally the rules are rewritten afterwards. Now, City. I’m not defending them. A commission found they entered into sham agreements and broke the spending limits. A sham is an arrangement that isn’t what it claims to be, so that’s a different thing from using a gap nobody had spotted. City deny it and will appeal. But I find it useful to ask/reflect on how people inside the club see it. From their point of view, PERHAPS they believe they were doing what elite competitors do: looking at the rules, finding the limits, challenging interpretations and moving faster than the regulatory system. From the outside, you might look at that and say, “That’s cheating.” From inside the organisation, they might say, “We found something nobody had thought of.” If you believe you’ve found a way to bring money in, more or less within the rules (and the commission said it was not in the rules and it was cheating), you might tell yourself you’re just being a sharp competitor. We are all asking “did City cheat?”. But I find this question interesting too: “how did City come to believe they weren’t?” And understanding a mindset, or trying to, isn’t excusing it.
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
Manchester City were found guilty of 114 out of 115 charges by an independent commission. The comparison made is not in the same ball park to the level of rule breaking Man City have committed. premierleague.com/en/news/472777…
2
4
48
2,177
I was watching silo the other day and then in one of the scenes recognised they were filming in ozone coffee in shoreditch and it ruined it for me 😂
2
2
1,518
Kae Kurd retweeted
So…… Let’s talk. How many Premier League titles have I won then? 🤔
5,401
39,029
3,385
377,470
16,034,720
Manchester City being found guilty is nothing we already don’t know. The sanctions will be the important part - whether the match the severity of the crimes and match what other clubs have had for lesser charges will be interesting. The one positive is we can disregard anything they’ve done and chalk it down to cheating.
5
2
1
45
3,529
TONIGHT! 🕖👇 @KaeKurd's Comedy Club: On The Road Doors: 6:45pm Last entry: 7:15pm Approx finish: 10pm 🎟️ Tickets can be purchased on the door or in advance from bit.ly/KaeKurdBham
1
2
580
There’s no better way of making a heartfelt statement then by constantly looking at a teleprompter
33
1,206
I do find it funny anytime a billionaire speaks people are shocked they have right wing views.
1
13
76
2,634
Nike is such an interesting case study. This fall from grace is probably how people felt went converse got toppled
4
17
5,830
The news of Sway passing is incredibly sad. Used to listen to him when I was in school. Little Derek was a classic as well as the remix of New York him Bruza and Baby Blue did. Icon.
4
12
1
133
5,374
At least spurs have money we don’t even have that
8
70
2,240
Not even surprised. It’s the hope that kills ya
1
13
1,246