you only have to ask me twice

East Bay
Joined December 2008
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I really forgot how laugh-out-loud funny Kicking & Screaming is until I rewatched this on Netflix a few days ago. Holy smokes this is funny as hell, even as an adult. Robert Duvall & Mike Ditka are perfect together in this movie. I’m so thankful this film exists. RIP Duvall.
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It’s asparagus season, which means it’s also “replenish your junk drawer rubber band” season.
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Pro tip: Every escape room is solvable in less than five minutes if you turn it into a smash room.
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Once you realize salads can just be thick cut salsas you can eat with a spoon, you’ll be eating more salads in no time.
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Replying to @LizAlderfer
Is your index finger knuckle also extremely dry and cracked due to slipping on sneakers with your finger!?!
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Replying to @mikestan
Do you watch “How to with John Wilson”? There is an episode that really gets off track in season 2, “how to appreciate wine” where he meets the founder of Bang and it’s exactly what you’d imagine he’d be like.
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Replying to @MunchIndia
Is it already sold out?!
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Replying to @YNB @MiracleWhip
Grew up on @MiracleWhip on toast! It was a treat! We couldn’t even afford the second slice of bread for a sandwich. If we were lucky there was a slice of American cheese.
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Replying to @LizAlderfer
May I recommend an IG account I recently discovered? instagram.com/fashion.biolog…
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Replying to @LizAlderfer
This is the good person’s version of the fly episode of Breaking Bad
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“Eat your uni” is the new “eat your vegetables” also I’m described as “a friend” in this article, so make room Agatha, Agnes, Jermaine, and Jack!
In one of my last pieces for the Guardian’s west coast bureau, I brought home a cooler full of spiny purple aliens and then cooked them and ate them for your reading pleasure theguardian.com/us-news/2021…
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9? 9! 9 is drier than a Brigham Young frat house. I’ll take ho hos all day!
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It’s a team sport, can’t count out the hype man’s contributions!
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Replying to @AliBouzari
COUNT ALL THE COOKIES!
Replying to @LizAlderfer
“I’m going to anger the democrats/republicans by counting this state, but it’s still early, still a lot of votes to count” but god damn John king doesn’t break.
Yeah you’re right. I don’t want to remember these last few nights.
Though John King’s energy and persistence in the last 24hrs is quite inspiring. Though I think I’ve watched so much of CNN that he just sounds like a broken record now “You gotta be patient”.
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It is a wine club wine that I do not care to admit how much I paid for it, also don’t really understand how it lasted more than a day in my fridge.
Replying to @LizAlderfer
Vanna is a national treasure that John King wishes he could be!
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