Wife: did you eat dinner?
Me: yeah
W: what did you have?
Me: half a pack of cookies
W: that’s not proper food...
Me: neither is the shite you feed me
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Tech Companies: 5G network
Consumers: YAYYYYYY
Tech Co: might fry your brains
Consumers: ohhhhhh ☹️
Tech Co: it’ll be 20x faster though
Consumers: YAYYYYYY
#5G #fried #letsdiefasterplease
I like music events that aren’t over the top.
There aren’t excessive visuals, lasers, lights, props, drugs, alcohol, people...
I like music events in my headphones
#rave
#Piday #happypiday
Them: Happy Pi Day!!
Me: it’s PIE*
Them: no, Pi as in 3.142
Me:
People: use your best assets to your advantage
Everyone else: *intelligence* *smile* *charm* *tits* *ass* *money*
Me: *panicking*
fractured mind retweeted
Facebook went down and Twitter took the piss – the 18 funniest reactions.
thepoke.co.uk/2019/03/14/fac…
Me: I’m goin home, I’ve had enough
Boss: what happened?
Me: #facebookisdown *storms out*
Boss:
The date is March 14th 2019. 24hrs after #facebookdown
Nobody remembers how to reach loved ones or eat food without posting updates and the global economy has collapsed.
The few Facebook users that migrated to twitter were among the lucky few to once again connect.











