Director, ResearchPlus | CEO @PushTalks | Author @human_script | #HigherEd #BSky: https://xitter.cf/t.co/541cNWYVoU #Threads: Johnnois
London, UK
Joined May 2009
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Please follow me at one of these places. I'll continue to tweet, but, you know, #ElonsExodus.
BlueSky: johnnyrich.com bsky.app/profile/johnnyrich.…
Threads: johnnois threads.net
LinkedIn: johnnyrich linkedin.com/in/johnnyrich/
Mastodon: @[email protected]
I am delighted that my cloning research is going so well. I’m beside myself with joy. #weakendpun
When the movie Gladiator came out, I assumed it was a sequel to Silence of the Lambs. #weakendpun
I hated the smart lighting system in my home so I replaced it with a dimmer switch. #weakendpun
@DisneyPlus You sent an email claiming I had duplicate accounts & wd face charges. This was distressing & wasted my time investigating. Eventually your chat confirmed it was your mistake & you already knew you'd sent out many such emails, but hadn't bothered to send a correction.
To make matters worse, when I discovered you'd knowingly left me in a state of worried uncertainty and you'd wasted my time, I decided to complain. I was told there is no complaints process, but my feedback "would be noted". I wouldn't get a response or apology.
I always make soup with my sibling. I cut the vegetables and he makes the stock. He’s my brother. #weakendpun
I’ve negotiated a deal to buy a consignment of shrink-wrap. It’s subject to contract. #weakendpun
Why did the rabbi catch a taxi to synagogue when he heard the blowing of the ram’s horn?
Because he was shofar-driven. #weakendpun
L’Shanah tovah
I write regularly for a chiropractic magazine. It’s a spinal column. I can show you my back issues. #weakendpun
I heard about an attack in which a handbag was used as a lethal weapon. It was as an accessory to murder. #weakendpun
The shiny fabric used to upholster my armchair wasn’t the right choice. It’s all worn out because it was sat in. #weakendpun
I joined a brass band, but they kicked me out when I turned up with a potato. They said they didn’t need a tuber player. #weakendpun
A friend was going to have gender reassignment surgery but changed his mind at the last minute. The doctor said he was a near miss. #weakendpun
When I was young, my teacher told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. I’ve learned since that apparently that’s ’identity theft’. #weakendpun
I lost my job as a car mechanic for swapping my overalls for a tuxedo. I blame my boss for telling me to change attire. #weakendpun
Johnny Rich retweeted
DEADLINE EXTENDED UNTIL 26TH JULY. Register your interest now in contributing a resource, reviewing, or joining our expert working group.
We are seeking experts in intelligent robotics, from academia, industry and engineering organisations, to develop resources for publication in the #ComplexSystemsToolkit.
epc.ac.uk/toolkit/intelligen…
Please register your interest in developing a resource by 12th July 2026.
I failed my driving test. When the examiner said, “Brake, fast”, apparently I wasn’t supposed to start eating a full English. #weakendpun
Johnny Rich retweeted
We are seeking experts in intelligent robotics, from academia, industry and engineering organisations, to develop resources for publication in the #ComplexSystemsToolkit.
epc.ac.uk/toolkit/intelligen…
Please register your interest in developing a resource by 12th July 2026.
I caught a salmon and was told it was best if cured. Sadly the vet couldn’t help. #weakendpun