hairstylist | artist | big dumb idiot | she/her

Maryland, USA
Joined December 2011
dude if you can’t love me at my boiled uncle, you don’t deserve me at my uncle pussy
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what’s wrong? you’ve hardly touched your boiled uncle pussy
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jiz retweeted
Decompressing after a stressful day by staring at the hypnotic rectangle that makes me want to kill myself
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jiz retweeted
Un día conocerás a una persona con quien vas a tener una química absurda y es importante que sepas que nunca estarán juntos.
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oh no i got tarot card readers on my fyp again, how does tiktok know i'm mentally ill before i realize it
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I don’t think you have a dog in this fight but if you did you would have shot it.
I’ll take @ellalangleymsic over Kacey Musgraves any day. And if I’m choosin’ Texas, I’ll take Ken Paxton over James Talarico.
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I gago bafroom
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Mi ex de tres años: Superado El man q vi tres veces: Tema sensible
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that coffee antique store hot flash urgent poop situation hits different when you’re on metformin
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Madurar es darte cuenta que NO lo extrañas, NUNCA estuvieron juntos, es que ni lo conoces, NO EXISTE. Te lo imaginaste todo, tienes esquizofrenia.
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25 Years Later. A note from Patrick: When you’re young, particular ages tend to come with certain milestones. 15: You can get your learner’s permit. 18: You can buy cigarettes if you want. 21: You can break edge without breaking the law (Andy is still edge!). 25, I’d always heard was the age at which you could rent a car. There was a time when I literally couldn’t imagine a life past the age of 21 let alone filling out paperwork at the Hertz counter. 25 just seemed so big and far away…like a distant body in deep space so remote that scientists only speculated about its existence based on the way objects around it moved. That’s certainly how I felt floating out in the zero gravity that is age 17. That was the year Fall Out Boy started. Now somehow the band is itself car renting age. How?! How am I 42? How is my band 25? And even harder to believe is the fact that anyone still wants to listen to our silly little band 25 years on. Maybe the surreality of it all is part of those milestones. It feels simultaneously so recent and yet so intangibly distant thinking of the origins of the band. I say this in no way to disparage the contributions of the great people we had in early incarnations of Fall Out Boy (Especially Ben and Mike; Hope you guys are doing well) but I always felt like the band really started when Andy finally agreed to join a little band over a year into it. So maybe depending on who you ask the “Ted’s Pants,” band gets to celebrate the car-rental age again some time in the middle of 2028. But until then, I’ll remain shocked that the four of us continue to enjoy working together, continue to be the same four guys this whole time (the so-called “Hiatus,” doesn’t count, we were very much still a band then no matter how exciting it is to imagine otherwise). Yet here we are. And if the world gives me another 25 years and perhaps another 25 after that, hopefully I will have spent as much of it as possible in the band from that one joke in the It’s Sunny/Abbott Elementary crossover. I couldn’t imagine a life past 21; Let’s see what milestones await the band beyond the cold orbit of social security collection eligibility age.
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sexting be like “why i oughta…”
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WASHINGTON D.C. - FREE SHOW - 3pm - OCTOBER 24 All donations will go to Human Concern International, divided equally among its humanitarian efforts in Palestine, Sudan, and Lebanon. Visit Ashowindc.com to donate and for more info.
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so what we get drunk so what we smoke weed we’re just having fun lois meg stewie
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it cant be good this is what i read everyday like a newspaper
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HAPPY VENUS RETROGRADE DAY!!!!
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sorry i Can’t hangout my clothes look fucking stupid on me
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i’m so serious who wants to buy my socks and videos of me stepping on shit
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i'm pretty sure my sea monkey is bicurious
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