DavidWSteel

I didn’t realise how much weight I had put on until I found a leaf in my belly button last night after doing the garden.

I had a hangover so bad yesterday that I thought I had contracted COViD.

I received this in my Christmas Card from my 14 year old. AI has a lot to answer to.

A sneaky Belarusian has slipped some tramadol into the Dane’s half-time cuppa #SCOGRE

“Willie’s in the Turf!” #BreedersCup

Hopefully Scotland can cover their gaping hole in defence and stop the Greek front two of Vaginitis and Cunilingus #SCOGRE

Glock pistol, Kriss Vector rifle, then AK-47. God bless America! 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

My grand-father was the pro at Glencruitten GC in the 1950s and often told me of the high number of scratch and first class players despite it being a par 62 I doubt very much that he would ever believe that a kid from that course would be tied for the lead of #USOpen going up 18

Nobody told me that when you get older you cease to be able to lie in. This is totally unacceptable s**t!

Time for the mute button as Coltart, Harmon and Davies take to the commentary box. As much fun as TB, typhoid and tetanus. #themasters

My first Scotland game. Sitting on the barrier on the North Terracing with lads round about telling everyone not to swear because I was a boy, then giving pellets to Bannon all the way through the second half The floodlights showed the beautiful, glistening pitch and nothing else

First Championship game for 33 years so I’ve pulled out “The Diesel”. #HTTR