Holidays Booked, Easily Googled Questions, Photos of Drinks in an Airport Bar; these are just some of the statuses pricks write to attract attention. Know any?
You know where
Joined January 2015
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Threw my TV out of a window because of that stupid fucking #cortana advert with those @cleanbandit clowns. #rockandroll #ihopeyourehappy
Saw Anna Jordan's truly brilliant play #Yen last night. Excellent writing and excellent acting. @WAPtheatre
New #MacBookPro? Be rude not to hey...? #Apple #colossalwasteofmoney #whatthefuckiswiththatmackeepershit
Facebook Hatuses retweeted
Looking to recreate some Uncle Buck-style pancake magic... xitter.cf/ASOS_Menswear/status/5…
Normally I would just write a FB status as it is said and let the irony be assumed BUT I HATE people who refer to their life as 'chapters'!
If you like #memes and you like shit slightly wrong head over to my boys at 'Slightly Wrong Memes' facebook.com/slightlywrongme…
Hay Smiths Legend and @therealgokwan Doppelgänger @Johnny_Marr. I met you in a pub the other week. The rudest fucking man I've ever met.
CHRIST! Not only has first class gobshite @ImogenWeekender turned back up but prize arsehole @JordanWeekender now too! #IbizaWeekender
UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH something about Monday and the remnant of my hangover... #monday
The ''it wasn't as frowned upon as much in the 70's, certainly not in the BBC anyway..." #BritishSexPositions
The 'it wasn't as frowned upon as much in the 70's, certainly not in the @BBC anyway..." #BritishSexPositions
It's weird how an innocuous pint of lager suddenly becomes incredibly interesting when photographed in an airport bar. Wait, no it doesn't.
Getting a table reservation for the 13th February is always so easy. That's why I love #ValentinesDay.
Anyone know the nearest McDonald's to me? I don't actually care because I know but it's a good segue in to telling you all I'm #hungover.
Got a spare 10 grand lying around, anyone know where I can waste it? #talktomepeople
Yes @ASOS_Menswear keep on doing what your doing yeah! #ispendalotofmoneyinyourshopitsabouttimeigotavoulcher