Professional instigator, amateur instigatee
Portland, OR
Joined May 2010
- Tweets4.8K
- Following144
- Followers98
- Likes48
My hot take is Amanda Gorman sucks. Girl's been getting a free ride since that Inauguration. Get you a poet who doesn't suck, like Ocean Vuong or Rupi Kaur.
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Should be a thing that when you're done voting in Oregon (all mail babbbbyyyyyy) you don't have to see any more political ads.
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This is my favorite Eric Adams bit.
“We are the Rome of America!” @NYCMayor says at Gracie Mansion event for Italians. Bold considering there is already another Rome, NY
xitter.cf/i/broadcasts/1MnGnDraQ…
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Advice to all people who write letters of recommendation: "tweaked" and "piqued" are two distinct words with different meanings. Using the second makes you sound good, using the first makes it sound like assault.
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Once again, people should be wary of giant killer college football powerhouse *squinting quite hard*...Vanderbilt? As a proud alumnus, never had a doubt.
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DECISION TO LEAVE (Park, 2023): A man meets a woman so hot that he forgets how to do his job (the plot of every noir film). 10/10 highly recommend.
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Everybody post your favorite Eric Adams nonsense. This one is burned into my brain forever.
Eric Adams gives the worst answer any politician has ever given to a soft ball question. xitter.cf/Newyorkist/status/1736…
Thinking about @Theobeidler in these troubling times.
Mayor Eric Adams at a town hall last week:
“I am the pilot, and you are all passengers. Pray for me to land the plane, cause there’s no parachutes on this plane, we’re all going down together.”
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The haters will tell you my cooking is too cilantro forward. Well, the haters are right. Honestly, great call from the haters.
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Check out this amazing campaign! charityfootprints.com/vascul… via @CharityFtprints
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Just heard the Lady Gaga version of Kendrick’s “Bitch Don’t Kill My Vibe” and let me tell ya, what an easy way to fantastically ruin your three-day weekend. Send her to The Hague for that.
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As I’ve always said, I’m proud to be an alumnus of college football powerhouse *checks notes* Vanderbilt.
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Pre-flight poop: Pleasant, wholesome, fodder for nice chat with your plane-mates
In-flight poop: Satanic, vile, fighting fodder with the guy who follows your turn
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The Midwest-ification of America is upon us. Soon the rest of America will also wear shorts when it’s 15 degrees F outside. We will no longer have to live in hiding!!!!
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Watching the Olympics. Fun, hilarious, cool. But man that Google ad with the AI “helping” a child write a fan letter is some of the grimmest stuff I’ve ever seen. Just awful.
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Shoutout to Kamala for learning the right lessons from Kendrick Lamar and executing flawlessly: Relentlessly call your opponent weird and stay on that message.
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