Useful at a dance, invaluable in a shipwreck
The Meadows
Joined November 2009
- Tweets5.1K
- Following739
- Followers1.1K
- Likes21.4K
Pinned Tweet
“Literally everyone should read this series“ - possibly the truest thing ever said on Twitter
Hey government, please can you send me loads more terrifying alarms telling me not to play with petrol and matches in the woods?
Started watching, thinking I probably wanted Paraguay to beat France. Now, I never want to see this Paraguay team win anything ever again
Just discovered that the dance routine in Coming to America was choreographed by Paula Abdul. Sometimes you learn something and your life does not change much.
Picked up a bike from @Halfords_uk. Realised later they hadn’t put on the mudguards I bought with it. Called the shop, thinking I’ll ask them to send me the mudguards. Their mistake, and this is the least hassle solution for me.
Called. Finally got through to a guy in a call
Train is delayed with no suggestion of when it might come. Really need a pee, but platform toilet is shut. Thank fuck they provide this space, or I might have become het up.
Angus Watson retweeted
I don't believe that any well adjusted grown adult was genuinely hurt by the Tourette outburst.
@bt_uk Our Internet was out for a week with no apology and no explanation and no forecast of when it might be back. At the end of the week I got an email. Here’s the apology, I said to myself. No, the email said our rates will be going up. Brilliant customer service
A week later a human phoned to discuss the complaint, and said I had to answer some data protection questions to talk about the case. I said no I didn’t. My private details are irrelevant to the complaint, and am I really going to pretend to be someone else to complain to them?
Angus Watson retweeted
This isn't how I envisioned my golden years. After battling cancer again and facing heart issues, I need help to cover overwhelming bills. Every little bit counts. Please share! gofund.me/cd35b7054
In London for the first time in a while. My god, it’s refreshing to be in a city where people know which side of the escalator to stand on.
On a busy train. On the other side of the carriage, 6 out of 8 of the double seats are occupied by one person, with their bag(s) on the other seat. Nobody standing, but people have walked through, looking wistfully at bag-filled seats. Are the double-seaters
100%fucking annoying
0%fine
11 votes • Final resultsEinstein said Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. He obviously never used a computer printer.
Never been more tempted to sign up to Mail Plus. Is the answer scratch it? Is the sufferer interested in finding out why her arse has been so itchy? @DailyMail
Have started following five minute exercises on YouTube as part of my attempt to become less fat. During this morning’s five minutes I was told “remember to breathe” seven times. I never associated gym types with genius, but surely this level of instruction is excessive?
Epileptics watching #Eurovision2025 must be getting a bit frustrated. What!!?? Another song with strobes? Alright Terry, I’ll go to the kitchen again. Shout when it’s over.
In house music competitions at school, we’d perform and think we did ok. Then we’d and watch the rest and think ‘oh shit they’re much better.’ So I know how Remember Monday are feeling and empathise #Eurovision2025