Greg Epstein

Rodney Thomas counts out loud and with his fingers.

Trey Smack, time to learn Chinese buddy.

Imagine explaining to someone that Jay-Z played an NFL stadium and the Pokémon rave next door was actually the better show that night.

Jayden Daniels gotta have the lowest football IQ in the league, and it’s not even close.

I’m so done with Nick Sirianni. It’s insane. The players didn’t lose this game, he did. Fourth liners gave everything they had and this idiot blows it because he can’t help himself rolling the dice.

Fire Sirianni. Eagles should be up six. Rams should need a touchdown here. Instead a field goal forces overtime and Philadelphia has more injured players than healthy. This man is an idiot.

That might be the worst pass interference call of all time. Get rid of human refs. This is a joke. Cowboys getting handed the game here.

The weirdest thing to come from the Pokémon madness is Walmart uses online drawings and comes out of it looking like an S-tier, well organized company & Target has people fighting in aisles and comes out of it looking like a disheveled madhouse stuck in 1994.

Sitting nine rows back from home plate at an LA Angels game. Two boomer women behind us have been loudly building an instacart order for four innings while their dead-inside husbands sit on opposite sides of them, staring blankly into the abyss. This team doesn’t need to exist.

No way, I can’t believe this. Never would have guessed.

Jared Verse is literally one tackle today away from making the Browns the winners of the Myles Garrett trade.

So are we all going to just pretend like the play clock running while the game clock was stopped during this Texas vs Ohio State game just didn’t happen?

“Jack Grealish, always a twinkle in his eye.” It’s called being drunk, mate.

The Ralph’s in Sherman Oaks, California installed a Pokémon vending machine last month and now at any given time there are at least 4 sweaty malnourished looking millennial dudes sitting in their car for hours on end lurking for the next scheduled release.

Eberechi Eze needs to get over being too cool to try hard immediately.

Betting against Arsenal when Kepa starts is literally free money.

Cathy Englebert will be remembered as the worst commissioner of any American sports league, full stop. This entire mess falls squarely on her. The WNBA needed guidance and vision. Instead she let her players wage both a race war & a gender war with no control whatsoever.

Seeing what LaMelo Ball’s apartment looked like really made being rich & famous seem overrated for a minute there.

Kepa must be the greatest training ground keeper of all time. There’s no other way to explain how he continually gets handed chances in net, let alone for a team like Arsenal.