It'd be great if @cityofedmonton bus drivers could choose between staring at me until I grab a transfer or scolding me for touching them

See, you're like a quadratic function, but I'm like a linear function. You may be taller than me, but I have no limit

You would not believe how racist Chinese toothpaste is.

Like not mushy, but mushier than bread should be.

Every time my mom wanted Drano she'd holler at me to fetch the final formula

That the dude who looks like a popsicle?

I'll feed ya a roll a quarters a buck at a time

Dude ain't pretty, but his dick big

I thought you were making labouring quad noises

Conch

I've got to go home, I haven't seen my family in three days...

Black isn't something I'm trying to be, it's what I'm trying to speak.

The harder you pull, the fatter it gets.

Like I miss you guys every dayyy But I've got to smoke fat with my roommates.

Have you seen the unreasonably bright spotlight?

Money's tight. These days I'm dipping my lobster in margarine just to make ends meet.

We should do more experiments on John.

What do you think is on the inside of a carrot John? The core is basically a vegetable bone.

John's really been letting love in lately. The other day I put my finger up his butt and he didn't even wake up.

Dexter's love sustains me. He's my emotional battery.