The Election Dildo

This coverage is seriously lacking excitement if you ask me #GE2015

.@paddypower How did you get these private photos? Is this the #fappening2015?

.@BeardedGenius Once you go purple...

.@guardian Are we going to have a problem here boys?

Alright lads?

What do you mean I'm banned from Deadline Day?

Might go give Welbeck another medical.

No longer the most offensive thing on SSN tonight, I'm fucking off. Cheers.

#TheRealThing RT @wayneveysey "Arsenal are looking at Celtic's Virgil van Dijk as an eleventh-hour alternative to Nastasic."

1000 people now following the dildo, going to run out of batteries at this rate...

Just did the Ice Bucket Challenge in a Stoke shirt, what a day.

Can't help but feel I've contributed to the buzz around this deadline day.

deal (2/2)

Aston Villa have pulled out of Cleverley (1/2)

Latest on the Falcao deal: I'm picking up good vibrations...

Just been on the phone to Alan Smith. Welbeck to Arsenal is done.

Fancy Melwood next...

Alright lads?