Ed McQue

What follows are SIX things you better get used to if your family is deciding on a puppy: 1. Destruction Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have a psychotic beaver in your house? No? What about giant adorable termite? You haven’t thought about that? Welcome to having a puppy. Anything is at risk. Oh you didn’t think an animal would eat a T.V. Remote? You didn’t know that the bottom of your couch was scrumptious and edible? If you don’t want something destroyed, throw it into the sun and save yourself some time. OR keep it out the puppy's zone of annihilation. 2. Bites Have you ever seen a dangerous wild animal baby and been like…aw…it sure is adorable, but look at it’s teeth! You have? It now lives in your house. Puppies bite because it’s A. How they explore the world. B. They are teething and it feels good to bite stuff C. They are small evil sharks. You have to teach your puppy not to bite you AND you shouldn’t encourage rough bite play. The puppy biting won’t go away in day, or a week, or a month. You will have a tiny monster that will randomly bite your toe so hard that sounds you didn’t know your body could make squeak out of your face. 3. Say goodbye to your free time or extra work hours Puppies are a ton of work. Look at your calendar for the next few months and then erase every entry and just write in bold letters: MAKE SURE THE PUPPY DOESN'T DIE. Puppies need around the clock care to start with. Everything that used to take priority is now over for you. This can be a hard pill to swallow. No, you can’t leave the puppy alone for 10 hours a day while you work. No, you can just let the puppy roam around the house while you watch Ted Lasso. That puppy is a baby. It’s an actual baby creature and it needs your full attention. 4. Poop and Pee Puppies don’t come potty trained. This is a main reason people adopt adult dogs. That little puppy, within minutes of eating or drinking or doing ANYTHING, will take a crap on your floor OR pee everywhere. You have to ask yourself are you ready for weeks to months (yes for some dogs it takes months) of poop and pee. Ask yourself: Are you ok grabbing a peeing dog and hauling it outside while it pees everywhere, including on you and the walls and your shoes so you can teach it to go outside? Poop and Pee could be a deal breaker. 5. Possible Injury and Illness Puppies look invincible. They are made of rubber and springs and the sharpest fangs in the world. They will run full steam into things and trip over their feet. Yes, they are FREAKING hilarious all the time as they learn to control their bodies. But no, they are NOT invincible, nor are the impervious from deadly illness. A puppy can break itself just as easily (if not more so) than an adult dog. A puppy can get specific illnesses that within hours or days could snuff their life out. As a new puppy parent you have protect that little baby. Falls can injure or kill them. Stairs can break their bones. Illness they are exposed to before they can be vaccinated can kill them. Listen to your vet AND either get pet insurance or start a slush fund. 6. Love I’m warning you. Any dog, regardless of the age, when it becomes part of your family, will change your life forever. A puppy is going to challenge you in ways you didn’t think possible, but in return, your life will never be the same. That puppy will love you with the force of a thousand hurricanes. With training, it will grow into a companion that will be your best friend. Why? There is nothing on Earth that will love you like that puppy will. It is a privilege and honor to have such a creature in your house. All that puppy wants is affection, attention, and structure. If you can give it, you will get back the currency of unquantifiable love. Pretty good return on investment.