Drytown (@Drytown1) header
Drytown (@Drytown1) profile picture

Drytown

@Drytown1

I recently wrote a zombie novella. You should buy a copy or 22. https://xitter.cf/t.co/XfpCGYgUbI

xitter.cf/search?q=from%3Adrytown1%20exclude%3Areplies&s=09
Joined April 2019
  • Tweets5.7K
  • Following1.1K
  • Followers1.4K
My children's picture book about an anthropomorphic rear-end's first day of school is now available on Amazon--FREE Kindle Unlimited ebook. Please download, enjoy, and review. Thank you! #WritingCommunity #ChildrensBooks #children amazon.com/dp/B0B76P23PN/ref…
Suzie Buttler's First Day of School (The Adventures of Suzie Buttler! Book 1)

Suzie Buttler's First Day of School (The Adventures of Suzie Buttler! Book 1)

, a spirited little girl who was born in the shape of a (Yes, you read that right!) Her older brother is a brat, and her classmates can be callous, but, with tenacity and ingenuity, Suzie is excited...

amazon.com
1
1
5
I saw a post that said we're living in a pust-laterite era. What an idiot!
11
"You're going to want an open kitchen floorplan so that everyone can enjoy the smoke, odors, and banging noises." --interior designers, I guess 🤷🏻‍♂️
15
if it requires a bra I'm there against my will
2
26
1
62
1,469
A girl just made eye contact with me. Nice try China.
500
7,231
262
125,827
2,005,223
It's the year 2130. Donald Trump is playing 127D chess....
1
1
29
Drytown retweeted
richard (@Dickwith2dogs) profile picture
richard@Dickwith2dogsNov 8
Wanna feel old ? This is Russell Brand now.
Image from richard (@Dickwith2dogs)
59
436
15
5,164
87,217
Classic
Image from Stoner Jesus Too (@SJ420Too)
24
141
11
2,197
40,357
Black people hate it when I say the N word. I don't know why, they just really don't like it.
1
1
58
I assume all my exes are lesbians now.
46
I just want to get my drinking down to the amount I tell my doctor it's at.
5
96
Drytown retweeted
cartonero (@flanchota) profile picture
cartonero
@flanchotaNov 1
pov: vas a una “cafetería de especialidad”
392
2,479
370
27,627
1,779,858
Drytown retweeted
Drytown (@Drytown1) profile picture
Drytown@Drytown120 Oct 2021
"If you kids find any Halloween candy that looks like it was laced w/drugs, bring it to me. Then leave daddy alone for about... 4 to 6 hours."
8
1
33
Friend: What do they have in Chinatown? Me: Just a bunch of junk made in China. Friend: Awesome! Me: Uh, yeah.
32
Screw social media, I think a person's calculator history should be publicly available. I can feel some of you sweating.
35
I sometimes hear people say employers reject them cuz they're overqualified. Why don't these people just leave some qualifications off their resume/interview? They're in control of that, aren't they? If that were me and I kept having that problem, I'd just keep my PhD on the DL🤔
25
My favorite part of the 'Bad' music video is where Wesley Snipes accuses Michael Jackson of turning into a sissy, and Jackson proceeds to prove him wrong by performing a flamboyant 4-minute dance routine.
39
Image from Drytown (@Drytown1)
1
27
"You'll hear the term 'gangbang' 27 times a day," definitely wasn't on my 2026 bingo card.
40
Ever notice how people say 'not to be too graphic' right after telling you the grossest thing you've ever heard?
1
2
161
For guys, every Halloween costume is slutty.
51
Load more