The Philadelphia Eagles have not won a game since Drexel University closed the Academy of Natural Sciences. Do with this information what you will

Just in: Sacramento Kings guard Ben Simmons is believed to have sustained a torn Achilles tendon at practice Sunday, sources tell ESPN. A suspected season-ending injury for Simmons after rejuvenated and impressive training camp and preseason performances.

Chicago is great but its problems are obvious: it was built over soggy marshland and, to this day, ancient amphibians, pale salamanders the size of train cars and toads the size of houses, slumber in the soft mud beneath the water table. One day, those monsters will wake up.

Breaking: After consultations with numerous doctors and experts that went into Saturday, the #Eagles are placing quarterback Jalen Hurts on injured reserve, sources tell @AdamSchefter and me. Hurts is now out for the foreseeable future. More information coming…

The Philadelphia Eagles have not won a game since Drexel University closed the Academy of Natural Sciences. Do with this information what you will

Final. #PHIvsDET

Ch Va

Breaking: #Eagles QB Jalen Hurts is out for Sunday due to a superficial blood clot. Full statement from the #Eagles on QB Jalen Hurts:   “On Thursday, October 8th, Jalen visited the training room after practice requesting treatment for his calf. He informed the medical staff he had been cleated during the Rams game on October 4th. This was his first treatment session for the calf injury following the game, after having practiced in full both Wednesday and Thursday. On Friday, Jalen received treatment, practiced in full, and was added to the practice report.   “Out of an abundance of caution, an ultrasound was performed on Saturday following the team’s flight to London and walkthrough. The ultrasound revealed a superficial blood clot. Our medical staff and doctors in London reviewed the results and concluded that activity and mobility were important and that Jalen could safely play. Doctors recommended a follow-up ultrasound within 72 hours of the game and the return flight to Philadelphia.    “Jalen played without limitation in the game Sunday, received treatment on Monday and Tuesday, and practiced in full on Wednesday, as reflected in the practice report. Throughout our time in London and this week, we have remained in communication with the league office regarding the matter.     "On Wednesday night, a follow-up ultrasound revealed movement in the small blood clot. Jalen will be out for Sunday’s game vs. the Panthers as we determine the appropriate course of treatment. His health and safety are our highest priority.”

THINGS TO SAY TO A TAXONOMIST: - "immediately make it a new family" - "name it elegans" - "sell me this holotype" - "i brought my own maximum likelihood tree" - "what are your intentions with my phylogenies?"