Richard's Dark Side

Seeing a play tonight. Just had botox so I must look thrilled, surprised and sad in rotation, in order to help it bed in, making me the perfect audience member.

I've gone from "Jeez how can my credit card bill be that high, right, that's it, no more theatre trips for me" to booking two more shows in the space of an hour. I need Theatreaholics Anonymous to make me admit my powerlessness. Which sounds quite horny.

Off to Canterbury Wetherspoon tonight with a big bag of dildos, stockings and latex so apologies to the staff when I inevitably forget to collect them on my way home. Probably best you just bin them without exploring them too thoroughly.

Being dragged through the woods by an eager monster.