@DJNewStyle

No thank you. Leaving for bluer skies.

 New Jersey
Joined July 2008
  • Tweets13.6K
  • Following882
  • Followers645
954Media
I think I figured out what my last tweet will be: 🦋
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This app remained a bird icon on my phone until the very end.
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Jennifer Aniston isn’t aging. Will she ever look like an old lady or will she hit 65 and explode like a dead deer?
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S’mores are overrated
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I really hate the Dodgers and their fucking Fortnite dance
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Watching a movie from the 90’s and most people have real teeth with flaws.
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Pete Rose should have been in the hall of fame before he died.
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I know I shouldn’t want my kid to call ask for “bahammi” and that learning how to pronounce “salami” properly is a goal, but I’m just not ready yet.
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Yeah, go figure out what I meant to write. I’m not paying to edit this bullshit.
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“Alright, let’s crunch one out there big dude” - Me, trying to motivate my elderly dog to crap in the grass, not realizing my neighbors were outside.
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1999 “Hey Rick, these lyrics are great but shouldn’t the title be La Vida Loca? Isn’t that the feminine version in Spanish? Also, I fixed a bunch of typos. For some reason all of the “she’s” were missing the leading s. Great work kid!”
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They bullied the fuck out of Ricky Martin back then and most people didn’t say a fucking thing.
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My daughter has decided that she is a Jets fan. Sometimes you need to let kids make their own mistakes.
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Either these are still being made or I am about to have crippling diarrhea.
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“Both” is not an unreasonable reply
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My three year old has a cool new hobby which is taking the shit of a lifetime and flushing an entire roll of toilet paper so he can have the empty tube and bother me while I plunge a sewage clogged toilet for 20 minutes. 10/10, have kids.
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I don't want to hear about another fucking AI startup until someone realizes that leasing Sinbad's likeness and making this movie would finally shield us from having to hear about this ever again.
Time Capsule Tales
@timecaptales20 Aug 2024
A thread of wild examples of the Mandela Effect you (probably) hadn’t heard about 1. Sinbad in ‘Shazaam’ - Many claim to have seen a movie called "Shazaam," wherein American comedian & actor Sinbad played a genie summoned by a young brother and sister. No such movie exists.
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RIP @vagpoop. It's odd to see someone posting from that account again and replying to his old tweets just because they got a reply from @billburr. It's like buying a dead guy's car and keeping the air freshener.
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I like when I’m watching a movie that isn’t Happy Gilmore and Shooter McGavin’s in it.
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Don't you love when someone checks out of a Slack thread only to come back 80 replies later asking for fucking Cliff's notes?
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