DECENT CANDLES

AFTER ALL, WHY NOT? WHY THE FUCK SHOULDN’T HE KEEP IT?

INVENTORY RUNNING LOW. COME GET THESE FUCKING CANDLES WHILE YOU STILL CAN.

WE JUST RESTOCKED. GO BUY SHIT.

WEEKEND SALE. $10 OFF EVERY CANDLE WHEN YOU BUY TWO OR MORE. FROM NOW UNTIL MONDAY. OR UNTIL WE RUN OUT OF FUCKING CANDLES.

8==D

IF YOU SEE THIS THEN YOU’RE A LITTLE FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT LOSER.

SALE ENDS MONDAY. $5 OFF ALL CANDLES UNTIL THEN. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU WAITING FOR?

WEEKEND SALE. ALL CANDLES ARE $5 OFF UNTIL MONDAY. STOP WHATEVER DUMB SHIT YOU’RE DOING RIGHT NOW AND GO BUY SOME.

BEND THE KNEE YOU LITTLE DICKHEAD.

THE FORECAST CALLS FOR GOLDEN SHOWERS.

YOUR SACK IS FILLED TO THE BRIM AND NOT WITH BERTIE BOT'S EVERY FLAVOR BEANS.