Cryptodanny

It’s always like this. At first, you assume it's temporary. You self gaslight yourself that everyone has bad days, that you're just going through something, that if you wait long enough, the feeling will pass. You become an expert at self impersonation. You count the hours until night because sleep is the only time you don't have to consciously exist. Your heart keeps beating. And then morning comes anyway. It always comes. Your body continues its pathetic little routine. Days pass, weeks, maybe months. And then suddenly you slowly but surely lose that power to self gaslight. You search for answers as to why you no longer recognize yourself. Because the person smiling in those photos few weeks ago is a version of you that you can’t remember And then you become envious of the you who laughed genuinely at jokes. But the darkness remains.