FSD v14.3.8 protected my whole family once again.❤️❤️❤️👍👍👍 I’ll say it again: most humans simply aren’t cut out for driving. And seriously… what the hell was the car on the right trying to do? 🤦‍♂️👀

Time for lunch! 🍽️

And THIS is the Tesla influencer you guys look up to? Get your nasty feet off the Cybercab seat and put your shoes back on!😡 It’s a Robotaxi, not your personal car. Have some basic manners.

Learning Spanish. So far, I can order coffee, water, bread, tea, and milk. At least I know I won’t starve when I go to Spain.😂

That’s how you know it’s a real Tesla. If the build quality is too perfect, it’s probably fake. 😂

If your garage runs out of parking space, just get a Roadster…..

If you want to flex without making it too obvious, here’s one way to do it…

Tesla Roadster gets unveiled. Other automakers immediately call their top engineers into a meeting: “So… how do we build something like this?” The engineers just sit there, speechless. 😶 CEO: “Okay… can we at least build something close?” The engineers look at each other. One finally says: “Well… we can make it look the same.” CEO: “And make it fly?” Engineer: “No.” CEO: “0–60 mph in one second?” Engineer: “Also no.” CEO: “So basically… we can copy the shape?” Engineer: “Pretty much.” 😮‍💨

Come on, can’t you drop a little more. This is getting boring. 🥱

I won’t be attending the Tesla Roadster launch tomorrow. Can’t wait for my mind to be blown as well.

Russell 2000 is getting hit the hardest today, down about 1.93%. Nasdaq is right behind at -1.88%, S&P 500 is down 1.11%, and the Dow is barely red at -0.09%.

$CIFR, go ahead. Drop even more. I dare you. 😏

Stock is like a dick…

How did I end up falling for this snowboard? 👀 I’m getting too old for this. Nope, nope… not for me. Maybe I’ll get it for my son instead… but he doesn’t like red. 😂

Go ahead, drop below $10. I dare you.🔥💪

Street Fighter was a huge part of my childhood. I grew up playing it in arcades, so I’m really looking forward to the movie.

Looks like all three of these puts might come back to bite me. Don’t copy me, guys.

Why does the market start dumping every time I sell a put? 😂 Wall Street, are you guys specifically targeting me as exit liquidity or what? The problem is… I don’t even have that much money for you to take. 😭

My wife baked some delicious bread today. Me: Well, I guess today’s run and lifting were all for nothing. My wife: It’s okay to indulge once in a while. Besides, you’re still going swimming with the kid tonight. Just enjoy your bread!

Snow season is almost here! ❄️🏂

Feels like everything’s getting more expensive lately. Even beef has gone up quite a bit. But I’ve got no choice, no beef, weak man. 😂