Chuck Norris U (@ChuckNorrisU) profile picture

Chuck Norris U

@ChuckNorrisU

Everything you ever wanted to know about Chuck Norris. CNU is not affiliated with Chuck Norris, Walker Texas Ranger or the Texas Rangers.

 TEXAS
Joined October 2010
  • Tweets5.5K
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  • Followers10.9K
Inappropriate Selfies Taken At Awkward Moments chucknorrisu.likes.com/selfi…
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Once upon a time, I urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke, that truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
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Walker Texas Ranger is one of the greatest shows on television still today. #ChuckNorris
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I can eat soup with a fork.
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I was bitten by a werewolf. When full moon came, the werewolf turned into Chuck Norris.
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I can dry clothes underwater.
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No one knows that the missing piece of apple in Apple’s Logo was eaten by me.
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Once upon a time, I kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as Giraffes.
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I can roundhouse kick your cell phone and kill everyone in the address book.
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Yes, I died this morning. But I'm fine now.
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Death once had a near-ChuckNorris experience.
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I can send you a roundhouse kick by E-Mail, Whatsapp and BBM.
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I don't have hair on my testicles because hair won't grow on steel.
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Once upon a time, Voldemort challenged me to a fight. The loser had to have his nose cut.
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punched #ChuckNorris in the face....then I woke up from my dream and applied for witness protection.
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'Great Britain' used to be just 'Britain' until I liked it on Facebook.
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I put that "FU" in "Funny".
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When Graham Bell discovered the telephone, he found two missed calls from Chuck Norris.
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I was bitten by a werewolf. When full moon came, the werewolf turned into Chuck Norris.
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For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For me, each testicle is larger than the other one.
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