Welcome to $CAT: Catching Absolute Tops. We wait patiently all day for the market to reach the absolute highest top, ape in with max leverage, watch our portfolio drop -99% in 4 seconds, and immediately scream DEV SCAM!! in Telegram. We help you catch the absolute top every single day by automatically distributing 100% of the 1% tax in $SPYx rewards straight into your wallet! Think of it as a participation trophy for your catastrophic trading timing. The moment you stop seeing $SPYx rewards hit your wallet, you'll immediately know the chart has nuked -99%! No charts required. $CAT (Catching Absolute Tops) is a meme coin created for purely satirical purposes. It has no intrinsic value or financial return expectations. You will likely buy the ATH and watch your balance drop -99%. Always trade responsibly! Official website: catchingabsolutetops.com Official ca: 8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

Scientists say nothing escapes a black hole. My money already tested that.

A zombie grabbed the phone, looked at the chart, and put it back. Even the undead have standards. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

They asked who the clown was. I raised my hand and the chart. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

No treasure down here. Just the chart and me, both headed for the bottom.

Went through the haunted house. Ghosts, jump scares, the whole thing. Opened the app at the end. That was worse. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

They said get out. I said let me just check one more entry. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

Found someone who also only buys tops. We’re frens now. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP solana:x95HN3DWvbfCBtTjGm587z8suK3ec6cwQwgZNLbWKyp

Even the ocean can’t stop me. If there’s a top, I’m catching it. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

Tried explaining to her why it’s noodles again. Showed her the chart. She didn’t need the rest of the story. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

Everyone’s losing it over the car that goes to space. I opened my phone and remembered I can’t even afford the cone from yesterday. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

Signed up for a cooking class to learn something useful. Set the pan on fire. The instructor asked if I do this at home. I said only with money.

Guy came over, saw the screen, saw my face, and said, “You good?” I was not. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP 🐈

He said: “What can I get you?” I said a time machine and a cheaper cone. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

Used to read the docs. Now I just read the percentage and hit buy. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

They missed billions in suspicious activity. I miss every bottom. We’re not the same, but the chart looks similar. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP

Candles. Soft music. Still thinking about the top I bought. Not relaxed. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP 🐈

Filed a missing report for my profits. They asked when I last saw them. I said right before I bought the top.

Found the answer. Didn’t like it. Put it back. solana:8erE7RkkoiGYJtCyQdfwMpnNA8cAkY14Xe6RYjjHAdKP