Just picked up this new collectible bottleneckgallery.com/produc… via @Bottlenecknyc #bng

Thank you @POTUS for creating another opportunity for the members of the Trump family to not serve in the US military.

"It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it." - Maurice Switzer [1906] Bless her heart.

Someone's dreaming about having bedroom fun with Ivanka.

"Jimmy's pushing up daisies." RIP Jommy

I truly, truly hope that Mango Mussolini gets the full Mussolini treatment when he dies. history.com/news/mussolinis-…

.@McDonalds Placed an order through the app. Arrived at restaurant to pick up my order. Was told the system is down. They can't access my order and that there's no refunds. Quite a scam you've got going there.

I'm at a screening of @BorderlandsFilm at a @Cinemark. Maybe this movie is flopping because they're leaving the house lights on full during the movie.

What's up with dudes in Ohio sticking their dicks in places dicks don't belong? J.D. Vance sticks his dick in couches. GOP members of the Ohio Supreme Court stick their dicks in boneless wings. I mean, that's the only way I can think that a boneless wing would have a bone in it.

What's the difference between J.D. Vance and a couch? A couch won't stay up all night to have bedroom fun with J.D. Vance.

Hey look... it's Flagfucker and Couchfucker!

Just saw 'Twisters.' My favorite part was when everyone had to put their left foot on a green dot.

Laura Loomer is the new Ann Coulter. She's even trying to make her head more horse-like. She's failing, but trying. If failing were a mutant power, Laura would be queen of the X-Men.

Welcome to Texas

Longlegs

Question for those who've seen @LonglegsFilm... did you find like 90% of the dialogue impossible to understand? I don't know if it was the auditorium I was in, but the dialogue sounded like it was coming from a drive-thru speaker with a pillow over it. Oh well. Film looked cool.