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La Crosse, Alcherus
Joined November 2022
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BREAKING: ICE Barbie & plastic human, @KristiNoem, is being fired from leading DHS, after enough people finally realized how incompetent she is, from sleeping with her married colleague to spending $220M on videos of herself in various costumes. More on Cricket’s revenge at 4pm!
Breaking: President Trump is preparing to fire Kristi Noem, advisers say on.wsj.com/4ujl6vN
BREAKING: Nazis from the @DHSgov and @ICEgov, under the direction of plastic surgery Barbie @Sec_Noem just murdered an American citizen in cold blood. This is America now. More on why we are all asking: Are you great again? at 6pm.
To all of the MAGA Republicans and ICE defenders who are claiming that this woman in Minneapolis, Minnesota, tried to run ICE officers over with her car before they shot and killed her, here is the actual video.
As you can clearly see, there are three ICE officers to the side of her car, and she slowly pulls away as they shoot her in the face. This is Trump‘s America.
BREAKING: the most competent admin in U.S. history has launched an attack into Venezuela to kidnap the president, steal the oil/gold, apparently run the country, & change the regime, even though all the other power players remain. More on why Epstein played a role in this at 9pm!
BREAKING: Explosions heard over Venezuelan capital Caracas amid US tensions
Read more: aje.io/pv5l3e
BREAKING: US President Trump announced a “warrior dividend” for active duty troops only during his rant on how terrible America was before him, but it turns out that he is taking money allocated for the troops to give a faux bonus to the troops. More on signs of dementia at 6pm!
OVERNIGHT: President Trump’s $1,776 checks for 1.45 million troops announced Wednesday night come from Congressionally-allocated reconciliation funds intended to subsidize housing allowances for service members, a senior official confirmed to @DefenseOne.
defenseone.com/policy/2025/1…
BREAKING: Georgia woman finds her conscious and her spine in Washington DC and resigns from U.S. Congress after MAGA Daddy drops endorsement and swoons over NYC Mayor-elect Mamdani in the White House. More on why JD Vance should start updating his resume tomorrow at 6am!
BREAKING: The President of the United States, Donald J.K. Trump, called for Democratic members of Congress to be hanged after urging the military to follow lawful orders only. More on how this helps explain why members of the military may need to disobey unlawful orders, at 6pm!
BREAKING: more damming evidence that Jeffery Epstein’s best friend is indeed in the Epstein Files, after emails have circulated claiming he spent hours at his house with a victim. More on why this season of America is getting even juicier, at 6pm!
Breaking News: House Democrats released emails in which Jeffrey Epstein alleged that Donald Trump knew of the convicted sex offender's conduct and “spent hours at my house” with a victim. nyti.ms/4hZ7csQ
BREAKING: JUSTICE PREVAILS! Sandwich guy, arrested by SWAT at his residence after throwing a Subway #6 with extra onions at a federal agent, walks out of court a free man, proving there may still be a sliver of justice left in the U.S. More on how where to buy Antifa mayo at 6pm!
Breaking news: A jury acquitted a D.C. man who was charged with assault after throwing a sandwich at a federal agent.
The one-sided food fight became a slapstick symbol of resistance to President Trump's" summertime takeover of local law enforcement. wapo.st/4oLmxA1
BREAKING: U.S. President Trump mistakenly given keys to excavator at White House, creating a perfect image of the current state of the U.S., destroying East Wing for gaudy ballroom. More on why millions of Americans are losing healthcare and can’t afford groceries at 9pm!
Demolition crews have begun tearing down part of the White House to build President Trump’s long-desired ballroom — despite his pledge that construction of the $250 million addition wouldn’t “interfere” with the existing building. wapo.st/3WOyU1A
BREAKING: Argentinian President is ‘rocking’ out to the United States’ $20B bailout to him, even when the U.S. refuses to feed their children in school and plans to gut healthcare from 16M citizens. More on the why the second ‘A’ in MAGA stands for Argentina, not America at 6pm!
BREAKING: the Republican Party in the United States admit they do not understand how either Congress or the United States Constitution work as their fall continues farther from their original values. More how next, they will say slavery wasn’t so bad, at 9pm!
🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
“If you burn an American flag, you get 1 year in jail.”
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
The President does not have the power to create a crime which would be punishable by jail time, only Congress can do that.
congress.gov/crs-product/R4…
Further, flag burning is expressive speech protected by the 1st Amendment, as the Supreme Court held in Texas v. Johnson and United States v. Eichman
uscourts.gov/about-federal-…
BREAKING: Law Enforcement in Washington D.C. have sent in SWAT and cameras to arrest a school shooter.
CORRECTION: the op was to apprehend the guy who *threw a Subway sandwich at an officer* earlier.
More on how a “good guy with a gun” couldn’t stop a mad man with a #6 at 5pm!
📹 Nighttime Routine: Operation Make D.C. Safe Again Edition
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
On Nov. 6, 2025, Sean Dunn, a.k.a. “Sandwich Guy,” whose arrest is shown in this video, was acquitted by a jury for the single misdemeanor count for which he was indicted.
nbcnews.com/news/amp/rcna2…
BREAKING: U.S. Pres Donald Trump wants to deploy the National Guard in D.C. to kill homeless people and fight crime, despite being at a 30-year low, but not when a violent mob destroyed the Capitol with intent to hang the Vice President on Jan 6. More on the Epstein files at 6pm!
Breaking News: President Trump said he was taking control of the police in Washington, D.C., and deploying 800 National Guard troops there in response to “out of control” crime — even though violent crime in the city has fallen. Follow live updates. nyti.ms/4mgXNyi
BREAKING: Brazil has just replaced the United States as the new beacon of democracy in the world as they actually follow the rule of law and bring justice to criminals. More on why there is no time better than the present to renew your passport at 6pm!
BREAKING: we have failed as a civilization. More on we should just push the Armageddon reset button and let the next generation of civilization in 200 million years try again at 8pm!
I co-parent with ChatGPT — I love turning off my brain and letting AI help raise my child trib.al/Cg5GKT9
BREAKING: ultra-right Oklahoma State Superintendent of Public Instruction and constitutionally confused @RyanWalters_ was caught watching pornography during meeting. More on how the 10 Commandants in schools could have prevented this and how to clear your browser history at 6pm!
Investigation inquiry underway after bombshell reports say board members saw naked women on Ryan Walters’ office TV during meeting kfor.com/news/local/investig…
BREAKING: In May, the DOJ notified President Donald J. Trump that his name, among many other prominent people, was in the Epstein files. More on how this is Barrack Obama’s fault at 6pm!
Exclusive: The Justice Department told President Trump in May that his name is among many in the Epstein files on.wsj.com/4mcTIKV
BREAKING: @lisamurkowski sold out the remaining 49 United States to give a $50K tax break for whalers in Alaska. When ask why she did it, she selfishly made it all about her struggle to vote. More on how Rand fucking Paul has more of a spine than Lisa Murkowski at 9pm!
Lisa Murkowski says it was ‘agonizing’ to vote for the megabill ow.ly/TkHf106es6x
BREAKING: US President Donald Trump commits act of war against Iran without congressional authorization, stating what military strategists claim is the “beginning signs of World War III.” More on why Kamala Harris wasn’t the ‘flawless’ candidate in 2024 election at 9pm!
OPINION: “Narrator: but he did send the army after them, not to solve the problem, but to distract the public from his middle school breakup from Elon. @thehill should fix this to show they are not a cabal of fools who continually commit journalistic malpractice.”
"Kamala’s newest lie: Trump will send the army after you" (@TheHillOpinion) trib.al/tJeV3mO
