Scientists confirm the weekend is 47% more enjoyable if you pretend Monday doesn’t exist until Sunday at 11pm. Good night.
Good morning: Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you. -Langston Hughes
My fragile little brain kept trying to make today Saturday all day. So the way I see it, tomorrow is a bonus.
Approaching weekend joy is 90% pure dopamine and 10% the delusion that you’ll actually rest. Good night.
Random gay liberal on line: today Texas's pronouns are yee and haw.
Until the Muslims complete their take over and your pronouns are head and less.
Somewhere right now a person is opening a package and whispering “what the fuck was I thinking” like it’s a prayer. Good night.
Our choice for governor in Ohio: the drunken communist or the opportunist. I should move across the river to West Virginia.
Undecided voters tonight are basically the last two people still looking at the menu after the restaurant closed. Good night.
I just got an email intended for a distant relative in Canada. Our names are very similar and so I'm guessing his email address must also be very similar to mine.