in gambling there’s winners and there’s quitters

Austin, TX
Joined November 2015
THE FBI NEEDS TO INVESTIGATE MADISON BEER’S BOX FOR DRAINING HERBERT’S FOOTBALL POWERS LIKE IT IS SPACE JAM
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Ryan retweeted
The gym at 2pm is fascinating. Not a single person in that room has a job they can explain in one sentence
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In light of Mintzy not staying the entire game... We're giving away two (2) pairs of tickets to two random people to attend an ALCS or NLCS game. To enter: ▫️Must be following us (@TickPick) ▫️Retweet Winner selected Sunday, October 11th at noon ET
I have no idea what Mintzy said but he has an early flight and is heading home. Thank you @TickPick! “Yeah” - Uncle Pat
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When is Pat McAfee dropping his second album? That shit was so fire.
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🚨GIVEAWAY ALERT🚨 We’re giving away a Vegas Vacation to kick things off 🤝 🏆 $1,100 WPT Prime Championship seat 🏨 3 FREE nights at Wynn Las Vegas 📅 December 7–10 To enter: RT this post + Tag a friend who you would take to Vegas Winner announced Monday.
🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨 Introducing… ClubWPT Gold's Vegas Vacation 🎰 WIN A SEAT, WIN A VEGAS VACATION! We are sending the first 100 WPT Prime and first 100 WPT World Championship qualifiers to Vegas with 3 FREE nights at Wynn Las Vegas 😱 ON US! Your prize pool stays UNTOUCHED. Your Vegas trip is our gift to you 🤝 It’s a race to the first 100. Will you make it in? ⏱️
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Not sure how to talk to #women so I’m practicing #ballsecurity
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Had to make an edit for the banger episode of @mostlysports today! 🔥🔥🔥
Mostly Sports is on one today!!
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Ryan retweeted
THERE WILL BE NO HATE WATCH IN UFC HISTORY THAT WILL EVER TOP THIS #UFC331
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Our @nickturani tests @kbnoswag knowledge of Sports Controversies.
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BIZ!!!
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9 Big Macs in and I have hit a wall Not a good time for little kids to start asking Ronald McDonald for a photo
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What did I do today? I watched @OhioTate eat 10 big Mac’s with notifications on. I might have a problem
14 hours and 10 Big Macs later… The Arch Man Challenge is complete ✅ Don’t do this to me ever again @OhioStateFB Oh and if this $37,000 raised to beat ALS isn’t enough for that Michigan troll….heres a bonus Ice Bucket Challenge for you
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10 am update: Lunch is about to be served here at McDonalds so I need to get my steps in on the treadmill I brought *Also we’ve raised over $17K to Beat ALS **Also comment below whether you want me to sing “The Eyes of Texas” or “Choosin Texas” later today in the dining room
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If michigan played the taliban I'd be in the stands with an AK and a turban
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Ryan retweeted
sometimes i worry that i only drink mexican beers to impress mexicans. then i take a sip of mexican beer and realize that the only mexican im trying to impress is the mexican deep inside myself. the inner mexican that all white boys have. gracias for reading
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GIVEAWAY: Giving away 5 $44 Coinmillion tickets to 5 people who like, RT, and comment their Coinpoker username on this post Gl!
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You see this @BarstoolBigCat?
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Why does nobody talk about how insane fake tits are. Like some super genius was just sitting around with the idea of just making babes have a bigger rack just for the hell of it. Do fake tits even have any other purpose other than looking sick? What a hilarious concept
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Ryan retweeted
I make her eyes roll back. Not in bed tho. I'm just annoying
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Me and a random old man after chopping the nightly
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