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' — Hᴏᴡ ғᴀsᴛ ᴄᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴜɴ ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ᴍʏ ᴛᴇᴇᴛʜ ᴀʀᴇ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɴᴇᴄᴋ ? ' first murderer cast down. lucifer's (s̶l̶a̶v̶e̶) secretary. not exactly the most polite. – ʟɪᴛᴇʀᴀᴛᴇ/ᴅᴇsᴄʀɪᴘᴛɪᴠᴇ – ᴄʀᴏssᴏᴠᴇʀs ᴡᴇʟᴄᴏᴍᴇ – ɴ(sғᴡ) #GoodOmensRP | #LuciferRP

Maybe he would give it a shot, if he was more trusting. Which he isn't. He's not just some demon! Actually, he's not a demon at all. Just one of Hell's most trusted advisors. He's above being mean to newbies.

Mars? People can go go Mars now? He's very behind on this all. He doesn't want to risk his immortal ass getting trapped floating in space forever. Come on! He deserves a break and Cain wants to be a good... host. Of sorts.

// heh Matthew Patthew.

His brother is certainly that. He still has no idea why he agreed to stay here. Yet. Here he is. —Oh. That's no fun. Taking a tour is just part of the welcome party.

See that's a good spin on this all! It can make you feel alive if you let it. He'll adjust. ...It's got plenty of uses. He could show him a few.

"My charming banter and killer smile." He offers with little more than a laugh. Sam was a good kid. By good, of course, he meant annoying and all kids of fucked up. "I'll be gentle. Well, gentle-ish."

...That's Game of Thrones level? That show must be incredibly tame. Shame. He almost considered watching it.

"Yes. Yes I am." He offers, taking all of his words in stride and to heart. "Oh. What a lovely welcome home present."

"I was imprisoned for many of your lifetimes and I'm always on my game." He smiles with a wink, crunching down on his candy. Clearly not the best at other people's feelings. What he did while away? A story for another time. "Please do."

"I never said I would kill him." He smiles, stretching as he gets up. Almost excited before he realized it was nothing more than a pen. "You really have gone vanilla..."

"Sounds like a good time..." He offers with a bright smile. Standing soon after. "Been wanting a chew toy."

"Hire some nerd to do it! You're better than some receptionist..." "As much as I hate your old man, he was never like this."

Imagine choosing to be a police officer... He couldn't relate.

Cain would break out into laughter. Holding his leg with a bright toothy smile. The sadistic glee clear in his eyes as he sits up. "It's not my fault that your job is so fucking boring, Sam."

He would pull the candy from his hair, popping it into his mouth with a grin. "Oh kind and merciful master! How kind you are for blessing me with such a gift!" He announced in a mocking voice, rolling his eyes and flopping back. Floor's comfy.

"Awe. I'm touched. Really." He'd shift to the side. Falling off the desk with a groan. Maybe he's been ignoring his training. Just a bit.

That's not going to do. Moves to sit on his desk with a defiant huff. "I /atleast/ deserve a hello, dick."

"Okay what more do I have to do? Bang pots and pans together... Fuck." "Hellooo! Your favorite person. I have returned."

"I'm back, you sexy bitches."

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